Kids World

Baby Bonus

2009-11-05T09:35:00.015+08:00

This is a gold coin for specially for Isaac. According to Chinese Zodiac, Isaac is born in the year of ox. This gold coin has the cutie ox on it, with the words "Wyeth Gold" just above the ox. At the back of the gold coin is written 'Congratulations' with the hospital name, Mount Alvernia Hospital and also the year 2009.

The picture on the left is a taken using my handphone and so the effect is not so good.

In this year 2009, many things happened. As written at my other blog, it is a 'double happiness' year.

The above photograph shows the gold coin and the beautiful orange box that contains it.

Photograph of the gold coin when opened up or showing the interior of the orange box.

My mother has given me so many gold coins over the years. I have a collection of gold coins, but this one is so special. Isaac was born in May and he is coming to six months old. I hope that my health is good so that I can take good care of him.

Isaac is my third child and we are entitled to receive 'baby bonus'. Isaac is a 'gift' from God and both me and Richard did not plan to receive 'baby bonus'. But everything just happened....

A Child of God

2008-09-12T13:05:00.000+08:00

And this is called NATIONAL SERVICE.

Just saw the Comments of Biofocus International at my sites. I did not check comments everyday... but just 'coincidentally', when I checked, I saw 'it' again.

Understood Can Already, Don't Need To Expose You
International! What a TITLE! Tell me, what is the meaning of INTERNATIONAL? Look at Prudential. If I am a customer of Prudential, and I am going to write about services of PRUDENTIAL like I did for Biofocus, ARE THEY going to SUE ME?

Desired Outcome of Education
If I am scared of BIOFOCUS INTERNATIONAL, all the THREATS they imposed written and verbal, AM I FIT TO BE CALLED a STUDENT OF National University of Singapore? I would do the Country a DISGRACE. I would do the NATION a DISGRACE. I would DESTROY THE REPUTATION Of NUS all because OF ME, how can I?????

Honour and GLORY
No Money, Want to die also DIE HONOURABLY. SO yes, I learned. I learned what is called HONOUR. I honoured JESUS, and I build up my FAITH. I learned what is the meaning of FAITH and what it means to place all my hope and TRUST on GOD, the one that loves me, and give me new life, my faithful friend, Jesus, always with me, guiding me.

Money OR LIFE
What is the use of having money when You do not even have LIFE? Want to earn money also EARN IT THROUGH ethical means and earn honourably and not retort to unscrupulous means.

How Much Is YOUR CAPABILITY
On my birthday, on the way to National Dental Centre at Outram Park, we met a Richard's friend and also was my 'insurance adviser', at that time, called insurance agent. Yes, at that point, that would be a more appropriate word for her, but not 'insurance adviser'. She is still my friend, and I never say anything about her service though I 'knew' it myself after my own experience being an insurance adviser with Prudential. And I MUST SAY, PRUDENTIAL is the best insurance company. I LEARNED so much from PRUDENTIAL, A LOT (I have no time to write on that yet, BUT WILL). I am very grateful to PRUDENTIAL and the people I came across.

MY EDUCATION, MY QUALIFICATION

Never had I a chance to show, never had I a feeling of 'dignity' and 'PRIDE' in my studies. Never had I a chance to 'Show off' my knowledge, never had I a chance to repay all the kindness to my parents, brothers and family, and my mentors, but now is my time...

All these were kept in my home cupboard, no place to hang them, not even 'of any meaning' to hang them at home.....

My NAME
But it is GOD that 'raised me'. It is Jesus who saved me. I know the meaning of my name, at last, and it is a name full of meaning... A name given by my parents and priests. All thanks to Father.

Some Reference For Head and Tail
Women’s Business
Facial Company Sue Customer

…Not DEAD yet… don’t know when is the last day yet:
BioFocus International Experience
Modern Cosmetology
BioFocus International
Pay To Suffer

Facial Company Sue Customer Matter:

Singapore I: The Divine Revelation; Moulding Our Nation
NUS REPUTATION:Singapore II: Answer Will Soon Be Out
Developing Courage
Do You Want To Save Your Mother
Unity Is Strength

And we are always children in the eyes of God, I am the child of God, serving God, My Father.

Marking Science Exam Papers

2008-09-11T10:16:00.000+08:00

If a child is motivated at school, he/she would come home energetic and happy. If my child is inspired in school, he/she would come home, TELLING me what she had learned on that day. I can feel her spirit and her energy... Sometimes, they told me things which I do not know of, and we 'discussed' about the matter.

A good teacher inspires the students
Lately, or not so lately, Clara's form teacher had given birth and now was unable to teach in the school. Relief teachers were called for, at least two. Ever since the change of teachers, I did not see the enthusiasm in her studies -- coming home with 'no words' to share. When Mdm Chua was teaching her, she came home always saying,"today teacher says...." or even asked me questions! But the relief teachers now, she also told me, "lousy", "always asked the children to do this and that..." I asked the names of the relief teachers. At the time of change, she told me that the Principal had told them about it. But we parents are not informed of the change. (Even for my son's case, their Chinese Class also undergoes several changes last year, but I was not informed of any changes. I called the teachers, and NO HELP at all.... what kind of collaboration is this?)

Relief Teachers
I was told that the relief teachers were very experienced teachers. I had seen 'older generation' teachers, fat, thin, Malay, Chinese, men and women. Sometimes the 'older generation' teachers did not 'brush' up on their skills, did not 'upgrade' themselves, and their 'knowledge' remain stagnant. Consider the education of last time, what the people used to study; and compared it with now, our Primary School Students are learning more things than the last generation of Primary School Students.

Work Load of Teachers
Teachers need to mark a lot of things, and it is not easy to be teachers. There are demanding parents you have to entertain, there are lots of responsibilities not only over the children's academic areas, but also their safety in the school. In the school, the teachers still have other duties to cover... and plus their own personal life after work.... But these are the things you ought to know and be prepared if you want to 'earn the money'.

Answer Sheet
Multiple Choice question is the easiest to mark. 1,2,3 or 4; or a, b, c, or d. Clear-cut marking. But when it comes to open-ended question, teachers need to read each and single questions..... very time-consuming and 'headache' especially for higher Primaries -- there are so many pages! (I look at my son's exam papers, I also feel 'giddy'.... imagine the poor teachers need to mark for 43 pupils in the class!)

(a) Describe, meaning what you see.... Based on the drawing, the stem is indeed thin.
(b) The stem creep up the fence because it cannot stand upright itself. It needs support so it can stand. Why wrong?
So this is one of the 'Specified questions' I asked the relief teacher to look into.

The first day returned the papers, with no answers/corrections done. As usual, I am not satisfied with some of the markings... I wrote a letter to the teacher, asking her to go through the specified questions...

The next day, the relief teacher called me, and explained to me. After that corrections was done...

Model Answer: (a) The plant has a weak stem.
(b) It creeps to get maximum sunlight.
Are you plants before? What is really meant by weak? If the plant is weak, would it have ENERGY to CLIMB up the fence? Are you describing what you see or 'Interpreting' what you think of the plant?

No marks were given or awarded to any of the 'specified questions'(I was not satisfied with the answers). But who am I? I am not even a qualified teacher! People teaching in the school! I go fly kite!

How is the electromagnet useful? Model Answer: The electromagnet will separate magnetic materials from non-magnetic materials. This is what the electromagnet CAN DO. Isn't it what the electromagnet does? But when we want to talk about USEFULNESS, what is usefulness? Useful means how it can HELP people, how it can HELP people to reduce time and reduce energy. To move or transfer vehicles (scrap cars, damaged vehicles) from one place to another and even to stack up the vehicles is its usefulness!

Why the fish die? The oil caused the fish to die, is it wrong? Children's brain, Primary 3 only, and simple answer like that is wrong! Only more complex answer like "there is not enough oxygen to make the fish stay alive" then is perfect answer??? (1 mark only!!! so simple question yet so difficult...)

Or Would You Prefer Suffocation
When I squeeze your nose, do not allow you to breathe, do you say you died of 'no air' or do you say you die of 'not enough oxygen'?

Science, Do you know everything under the sun?
Aren't you confusing the kids even more like that? I, 大学生(Da Xue Sheng), University graduate, From National University of Singapore, I dare not say I know everything. I have many things yet to discover. Say what you want about 大学生, and see our NUS standard, our MOE standard, our teachers in Singapore.....

Jurong West Secondary School

2008-08-25T00:27:00.001+08:00

On this day, 22 August 2008, I made a trip to my school, Boon Lay Secondary School. I took a train from Causeway Point, and reached Boon Lay MRT station. After alighting from Boon Lay MRT station, I walked to Boon Lay Secondary School (don't know the exact location, but based on 'memory' -- 'aga-aga' (estimate). I walked and walked and saw a school. I turned left and it was this school, Jurong West Secondary School which I came to.... There was no through road, and this was the only school there.

This school crest or badge is so interesting. It really 'captivate' me.

The eagle represents strength of character with outspread wings looking west, guarding the virtues of the school embodied within the school crest. The contoured shape and design of the crest is reminiscent of the badges of the guardians of the civilian society signifying discipline. Above its head and outspread wings, the initials of the school take position and precedence.

The school's virtues are symbolized by the four designs in the two halves of the crest. Two clasped hands form the shape of a heart symbolizing the school's aspiration to create individuals who will serve the needs of the community. The atomic symbol represents the need to be technologically oriented as mankind explores the realms of the digital age and cyberspace.

An unconventional square bulb symbolizes imaginative thinking to help nurture creative minds. A flaming torch representing life-long learning is placed over a scroll signifying academic excellence, the former taking precedence over the latter. And finally, displayed at the base of the crest, is the school motto reinforcing the courage of the eagle.

Jurong West Secondary School at 61 Jurong West St 65, Singapore 648348

I was about to leave, but saw this on the wall of the school...

I told the security guard that I wanted to take a photo of this wall, and he allowed. He was very friendly, though he was concerned about why I was taking photo.

On the wall shows the core values of the school: Integrity, Teamwork, Resilience, Innovation and Creativity, Excellence and Loyalty

School Vision: A vibrant community that produces all-round citizens.

Students and staff are reminded of their Core Values everytime they enter the school... the standard of Singapore's School has improved so much as compared to last time...

Next, I saw the school vision, the 'waterfall' and the school values.... I told the guard, I would just stay there, no further in.

However....

Wow, this school is so nice. I cannot help but walked a little further in. The security guard still standing there, watching me, but did not ask me to leave -- So thankful to him, an Indian man.

Can hear the water dripping sound, the koi swimming in the water... what a lovely place for the staff and students.

School Mission: The school seeks to nurture the moral, cognitive, physical, social and aesthetic development of the pupils.

This eagle sculpture just beside the 'water pond'. So nice.

Behind me, or opposite this beautiful 'water pond' is the general office, with all the awards as shown below:

Sustained Achievement Award and Roll of Honour..... WOW, looked so impressive. I thought of walking further to see the details of 'roll of honour', but that 'was bad' (I stayed too long in the school compound).

School Song
1. Dreams can be broken
But hope is over the rainbow
With our strength of character and majestic flight
We'll hold the dreams with our claws
We'll shine, oh what a sight!
Oh yes, we will fly to the sky,

Chorus:
Perched proudly as we see our destiny,
We'll be where dreams turn to reality,
Yes, we will soar, touch the sky, move the earth
We'll make a diff-er-ence, where eagles dare!

2. Challenges come but we dare
To overcome them all
With our powerful wings and eagle eyes
We'll meet the challenges with our claws without a sight
Oh yes, we will fly to the sky.

I love their website. At this page where they showed their school song, there are photos of the students holding the flag. This is showing pride for our nation, the flag, the symbol of our nation...

Looking at the History of the school, I was impressed by their facilities such as cyber cafe and amphitheatre facilities. Jurong West Secondary School functioned at the old Boon Lay Secondary premises along Jalan Boon Lay from January 2nd 2001 until it moved to its new present premises at 6, Jurong West St 65 on 18th March 2002.

Wow, I am amazed at the Teachers' Creed too!

Teachers' Creed
We, the teachers of JWSS
Pledge that: We will be true to our mission of moulding the academic, social, physical and aesthetics lives of our pupils. We will work hand in hand with one another and with our stakeholders to maximize the potential of our pupils. We will conduct ourselves in a manner befitting this noble profession. We will continue in our quest to learn and pass the love of learning to our pupils.

Civic and Moral Education Vision:
A person of integrity who acts responsibly with the welfare of others and the nation in mind.

CME Values: Honesty & Integrity; Responsibility to school, community and nation; Self-Discipline, Care & empathy for others.

Boon Lay Secondary School

2008-08-24T22:18:00.001+08:00

Boon Lay Secondary School

Leon Lai song, 是愛是縁 with photos of Boon Lay Secondary School.

Full of excitement when I thought of going back to my school, my 'mother school', 母校. I can still remember very clearly, the one who asked me this question. She asked me,"Why the school is called 'mother school' 母校 and not 'father school'?". She was my primary school, supposedly best friend or 'my best friend' (later I know that when I regard someone as my best friend, the other person may not regard me as their best friend)...

I am so grateful, SO full of gratitude to my Master, Jesus. Jesus opened up my mind and my eyes to see and know the truth of creation and the origin of life.

I searched the web and was so surprised to see the school being relocated. I thought of going back to my school in May, but have no time.

Boon Lay Secondary School was established in 1977 with 13 classes. It then had two main mediums of instruction: English and Chinese. It was officially opened by Mr Ngeow Pack Hua, MP for Boon Lay on 2nd August 1979. In 1988, it became a solely English-medium, double-session school. Over the years, the pupil population has grown from 13 classes in 1977 to 1231 students in 36 classes. In November 1999, the school relocated to its current premises, well-equipped with special rooms and IT-enabled classrooms.

The School Crest containing the letters BLSS, symbolises the luxuriant growth of a tree, thus conveying the meaning of an "ever-growing" institution.

Philosophy: Every pupil has the potential to learn, to achieve and to excel. The school will nurture this potential and provide all opportunities for his total development.
Vision: Every Boonlayian an individual of wisdom, purpose and compassion.
Mission: To provide a caring and orderly school environment which promotes moral, academic, physical, social and aesthetic excellence.

Core Values: Responsibility, Integrity, Perseverance, Respect, Compassion, Discipline

Desired Outcomes of Boonlayians:

Wisdom - Make informed and responsible decisions. Apply skills and knowledge; Be a life-long learner.

Purpose - Set life targets, Be forward looking, Be optimistic

Compassion - Feel love in whatever we do; Touch lives; Develop empathy.

I never know that the school has a creed... This is the School creed:
We, Boon Layians, Strive to be Outstanding in every way. Putting Others first, we will love and forgive. We will Nourish our minds with knowledge and Learn to make responsible decisions. We will Aim for excellence in all that we do, so as to become Youth of wisdom, purpose and compassion.

For more than 13 years, I had not seen the school. For about 20 years, I had not stepped into the school. On Friday, it was a great day...... I learned so many things...

written 24 August 2008, 10.16pm

Science Exam Paper

2008-08-13T11:47:00.000+08:00

This morning, Richard and I went to Woodlands North Plaza to buy breakfast. On the way home, I saw a cat (some distance away from the ATM machines). The cat was cleaning its genital parts using its mouth and tongues, spreading his legs. Richard said,"the cat is so flexible..."

Indeed, how beautiful and wonderful is the creation of God, the creator of this universe, of all that is seen and unseen... miraculous, it is awesome!

God make HUMANS different from animals. Animals walk on four legs, have no hands. Humans have hands and mouth. Animals cannot talk, but have mouth, their multi-purpose 'weapon'... Open its mouth, the teeth is what makes all the difference between the cats and humans, the animals and human as well...

Speaking of humans and animals, these are all lives, animals/mammals that can move. They are called living things. Something really surprises me. The real meaning of living things!

These are some questions from Clara's exam papers. I AM NOT interested to ARGUE about who is right and who is wrong. Right or wrong does not matter to me anymore. MARKS, as long as I know, and as long as I had explained to Clara, I won't pursue the matter or make a fuss of it. But this is to show, not to complain!

All living things can move. The Answer is TRUE. Clara's answer is False. Confusing.

Correct answer written beside the question marked wrong. All Living Things Can Move.

Half a mark gone. What is half a mark? Want me to go all the way to school tell the teacher, "Hey this is wrong, argue and 'tell' the teacher story?"

Anyway she passed, though it was not flying colours.... and Marks, Marks and Marks.... lets see, is marks really the main concern of the life of students.... 'a question mark'!

But look further, some more mistakes...

I wonder what Qi Hua meant by "Creativity is the birthright of every child"....

Similarity between a tadpole and a fish -- Clara's answer was: They can swim.
It was marked wrong.

Can tadpole swim? Definitely. This is not similarity based on physical appearances, but based on the imagination, the thoughts, the knowledge of the organisms behind the drawing.

The answer for this question (similarity between a tadpole and a fish) -- teacher's accepted answer: Both of them have tails.

Well, I agreed both have tails, then both have eyes, also acceptable answer then!

The next part of the question was "Named one difference between the tadpole and the fish."
Clara's Answer: The fish has a short tail but the tadpole has a longer tail.
Teacher's Answer: Fish has scales but tadpole don't.

............ How can teacher be wrong? Teacher LEI! I am not a teacher, I am a parent.... ACCEPT. This is a 'fact' -- the qualification of the teachers....

This question: Ruben placed some worms in an empty shoebox. Then he covered half the box with its lid. The other half of the box that was uncovered was shone with a lamp as shown in the diagram below. (a) Where will most of the worms be found after 20 minutes? (b) Give a reason for your answer in (a).

Most of the worms will be found in Area A. Correct.
Clara's reason: Worms stay in the dark so people will not step on them.

Teachers have answer sheet when they marked exam papers. But when it comes to science, it is not like Maths, English and Chinese Multiple choice questions. I wonder if the teacher how what is really SCIENCE!

Teacher's reason: The worms respond to changes in lighting by crawling to area A, which is darker.

This is just like asking:
Why do you close your eyes when you see strong light (eg. when you just walk out of a dark room) or when something moved in front of your eyes?
(C) I close my eyes to protect my eyes from the bright light or moving objects that tried to get near my eyes.
(T) I close my eyes because I respond to changes when there is a change in the intensity of light, when there is a change of movement...??????

Common sense. Is the teacher being rigid or have no common sense.

Are there any more mistakes, I do not know. But these are the obvious ones which I managed to flip through and spotted it... There are one more which I did not show....

Do you know what is the importance of half a mark? It determines whether you pass or fail. It determines whether your report book is going to have all blue or a 'one' or 'two' red among the blues. This is called 'pass' or 'fail', and how many subjects you pass or fail, it is going to determine whether you get promoted to the next level. This is all the olden days...

My mother need to go to school to ASK the teacher for leniency, to beg the teacher to let my brother pass his English, not one time, not two times. If he failed English, cannot be promoted to the next level. That is the importance of HALF a MARK......

And for NO GOOD ENGLISH, 'Go Fly Kite'......

Yusof Ishak Secondary School

2008-08-12T17:05:00.001+08:00

YISS School Badge and Motto
- The Sailing Boat symbolises the spirit of Discovery and Progress in the high seas of Knowledge. - The Three Kris represents Unity among the diverse race of students in the school, Integrity and Honour in all fields of Endeavour.
- The School Motto 'ILMU SULUH HIDUP' ( Knowledge is the Light of Life) is written across the face of the scroll at the base of the shield.

School Mission
- To nurture Curiosity, Creativity and Confidence in Yusoffians so that they will be Lifelong Learners who Contribute to the Greater Good.

Information about Yusof Ishak Secondary School
Yusof Ishak Secondary School (Abbreviation: YISS), A Leading and Learning Institution is a government secondary school located in Bukit Batok, Singapore.

The school was named after Yusof Ishak who was the first president of Singapore. The six values of YISS are Resilience, Responsibility, Respect, Compassion, Confidence, and Integrity and the school motto is 'ILMU SULUH HIDUP' ( Knowledge is the Light of Life).

Yusof Ishak Secondary School was established in 1965 at Jubilee Road (a side road of a section of Pasir Panjang Road which is now known as West Coast Road) as Jubilee Integrated Secondary School with Jubilee Primary School as its affiliate. It was an integrated school offering secondary education to an enrolment of 984 pupils and 37 teachers of two streams, in English and Malay. At that time, it was envisioned that the school would be serving the needs of the families residing around Pasir Panjang Road area as there were several malay kampungs dotted all along it. On 29 July 1966, then Prime Minister, Mr Lee Kuan Yew declared open Yusof Ishak Secondary School (YISS) at Jubilee Road.

This was the school which I often saw sitting in my family's car, either my big brother driving or my father; but usually was my big brother. I did not even know that who is Yusof Ishak, but it was an 'old school', with 'dirty' walls, the back view I saw on the expressway.

I love to sit in front of my elder brother's car. I love to put on the seat belt. I love to follow him then. I used to bring along a story book to read in the car. My brother bought me bible stories and two other story books -- Thumbelina and Cinderella. They are my favourite books.

This is our Singapore Money, President Series(Protrait Notes); this is one of the pieces of my collection, a precious one piece of one thousand dollar note.

I love to collect notes from all over the world. This is my only piece of S$1000 note which I had to give up already, otherwise if moths and termites come to eat it up, it would be gone.

I only discovered the back of it to be the Government only on National Day, 9 August 2008... WOW... I was reluctant to part with it....

Singapore President Series $1000 Note : I love this building so much, it is so nice, our Parliament House......

Singapore Parliament House: Walking Cats

City Hall cat and Sang Nila Utama Cat, Holy cats...'Enactment' of Sang Nila Utama sighting of a strange animal running into the forest....Founding of Singapura, Location: Singapore River, near Statue of Raffles

Dunearn Secondary School

2008-08-11T18:33:00.000+08:00

Dunearn Secondary School

Dunearn Secondary School is a government secondary school in Singapore. It is located in Bukit Batok in western Singapore. The school was established at Dunearn Road in 1962 as Dunearn Chinese Middle School, and merged with the neighbouring Dunearn Vocational School in 1969. It moved from Dunearn Road to its present location in 1993.

The current principal is Mr. Wong Lok Oon, who served Dunearn Secondary School from 15 December 2003. In 2003, Dunearn Secondary was part of a pioneer group of schools in Singapore to allow members of the public to use its football fields. The other schools were Meridian Junior College, Bedok North Secondary, Seng Kang Secondary, Sembawang Secondary and Serangoon Secondary.

Dunearn Secondary Technical School or Dunearn Hill Secondary School (1964 - 1992): Dunearn Secondary Technical School (DSTS) was founded in 1964 was officially opened by then Deputy Prime Minister, Dr Toh Chin Chye on Friday, 14 May 1965. This is a precious piece of photo found at this website The Official History of Dunearn Secondary Technical School (DSTS)

This is exactly what I had seen when I was young -- my big brother's school.... long flight of stairs, twirling here and there, leading up to the 'hilltop' ( DSTS was sited on a small hill sandwiched between Linden Drive and Hillcrest Road. To gain access to the school, one either had to take a 10-minute walk up a winding path or to climb a 103 stepped staircase leading to the top of the hill. No wonder DSTS had produced such good athletes during the 1970s as the walk or the climb to the school daily was a natural exercise) ..... the uniform was grey in colour then.

These are the small fine prints on the photo: how beautiful are the verses!
With majesty and pride she stands on the high hill top
Commanding respect and reverence from one and all
She is the home of students who come with high hopes
And an anvil where character and intellect is forged.
Her classrooms are her student's pride;
Her workshops a craftsman's paradise,
And her field an athlete's dream.
So stands a School -- a testimony in sand and stone
Of a nation's toil for a great future.

History of Dunearn Secondary Technical School
DSTS started in 1964 although it was officially opened on Friday, 14 May 1965, by the then Deputy Prime Minister, Dr Toh Chin Chye, and witnessed by the then Education Minister, Mr Ong Pang Boon. The School lasted until June 1992 when it had to move out of its Hillcrest site to Bukit Panjang. With the move, the school was renamed to Greenridge Secondary School.

Speaking of good athletes, it brought to mind that DSTS was indeed quite excellent in its sports. DSTS athletes always excelled in District and National levels and training was naturally conducted by Mr Kunalan. Besides athletics, the school was also famous for its rugby. Some of the rugby players and track and field members not only represented the school in district and national levels, there were one or two who represented Singapore in rugby and athletics in the SEAP Games (later known as SEA Games in 1975) during 1970s. Tennis and Girls Hockey were also sports which the school had excelled in both levels.

This was indeed true. My brother participated in cross country. He could run well, and at home, there were all his 'champion cups and medals'.

The school was a technical school and had the best technical facilities available during that time. Other schools such as Raffles Institution, Anglo Chinese School, Raffles Girls Secondary School would send their students to DSTS campus for their technical lessons.

The School’s motto “From Each His Best” exhorts every student to do his/her best in everything that he/she does. “Best” is the willingness to do what one can, not only in the academic or intellectual fields but also in the social, intellectual and public field as well. In this area, it is pleasing to learn that some of its former students have become very successful, and to name a few, we do have a Member of Parliament, chief executives of MNCs, pilots, a renowned jockey in Singapore, prominent businessmen, entrepreneurs, etc.

Written By Annie Yeo
Aug 2004 for Reunion 2004

Established 1962, Motto: Determined & Disciplined

The schools motto: "From Each His Best"

The School motto exhorts every students to do his best in everything that he does...

The word, "BEST" does not refer to intellectual ability alone. It does not mean distinctions and good grades in all subjects that you take, neither does it mean a first in position in class or the whole standard.

What it does mean that you give whatever you can offer to the best capability, whatever your limits maybe. We are aware that the limit to one's abilities varies from one person to another and we do not demand impossible or unreachable limits.

We only ask that you be willing to offer whatever you can, not only in the academic or intellectual fields but also in the social, intellectual and public fields as well!

You have pledged and promised to do your best to honour D.S.T.S. , to strive for the school's name and pride, to ensure glory for posterity and to be loyal, kind and true in all the things you do.

Let us hope that from today, if you have not done so in the past, you would stand up and practise what you have so solemnly pledged!

You have pledged yourself to the school, but what about the society and the world at large? It is necessary that you develop a sense of willingness and commitment as a member of the public!

Therefore, D.S.T.S. live up to your pledge!

Taken form school magazines in 1979

My brother had never completed his studies. He left the school when he was Secondary Three... Though he did not have high qualification, he showed great responsibilities and care over the family and his family...

Corporation Primary School

2008-07-01T00:48:00.000+08:00

This used to be Corporation Primary School. I was very sad at first when I saw Corporation Primary School no longer here. This is now Grace Orchard School.

Walking to St Joseph's Home, I saw Corporation Primary School. I was so happy. Corporation Primary School was not my school, but it was my brother's and my niece and nephews' school. It contains many sweet memories.

As usual, I am always very interested in school crest. The school crest bears the motto ‘Be Diligent and Helpful’, believing that diligent pupils know their work well and should always help those who need assistance. At the top of the crest is a book of knowledge and the educational torch is a beacon of truth and light.

Colour significance:
- White signifies everlasting purity and honesty.
- Green signifies youthful vigour in our pupils.
- Orange signifies alertness in our pupils' minds.

Corporation Primary School is just opposite St Joseph's Home. It looked so new, so nice, at this new location, Jurong West St 24. On that day when I visited the place, the school was closed. However, it gave me a nice feeling, a very 'welcome' sense of sensation -- standing at the guard post, I felt very 'warm-feeling' with the teachers standing (the poster) to welcome you. Painted with yellow and orange, it gave me a feeling of cheerfulness and brightness of life. In addition, the place is so serene, so quiet.

Something very good about Corporation Primary School is their timing and their 'Merged Stream'. Corporation Primary School starts at 8.00am and operates as a single session school. This is so good, both for teachers and students, and parents.

Corporation Primary School... achieved 100% Passes in PSLE -- Your Choice School!
Parents who intend to enrol their children in Primary School can really consider Corporation Primary School, really looked so impressive, especially with Merged Stream... 100% Passes in PSLE ! I am worried about my children's PSLE, never even heard of Merged Stream at QiHua Primary School.

Just Pictures

2008-06-30T14:33:00.000+08:00

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

Corporation Primary School: People Developer Award

Corporation Primary School: Your Choice School

Top PSLE Student; Impressive

A close-up view of Top PSLE Student, Nie Liang Jun

ToTal Defence

School-Parent Collaboration?

2008-05-12T11:48:00.000+08:00

Impress To Win
How beautiful it is FROM FAR the banner "People Developer" - Developing Our Staff To Their Fullest Potential. Everyday I send my children to school, I can see the banner. It was so new, so nice at first, but look at the banner now. A closer look and you can see it was torn and vandalized. This is what developing Singaporean is all about! Our education we received, and some more outside the school!

Strike Me, COME I WELCOME YOU
What's more, I received phone call from teacher Nana and teacher Sarsivanni (NOT their REAL NAME, in case I GET SUE!!) asking me to 'take down' the name of the teacher (Sarsivanni) on behalf of the PRINCIPAL.

Sin or Be SEEN
You know Singapore, everything under surveillance. This little red dot, what can you do much? Stand or walk around in the classroom and you will be seen or probably treated as SIN when you wanted to pick something up..... As a parent, as a Singaporean, DO I HAVE ANY HUMAN RIGHTS to voice out my opinion, to pour out my sorrows on my PERSONAL BLOG? Everything want to interfere, everything want to intervene, people make love, have sex need timing or need to write down the rules and right steps?

How nice everything was, everything in black and white? For show, all for SHOW!!!!
Philosophy - Parent's talent and involvement is resource to achieve excellence in education.

Belief - The school believes that parental involvement is indispensable for the optimum nature of each child entrusted to it.

Mission - To promote collaboration between parents and the school; To optimize on the former's expertise/talents and resources; To enhance the quality of the school's selected programmes.

Vision - School-Parent Collaboration for excellence

Does the school HEAR WHAT WE, PARENTS SAY?

Parent-School or Parent-Teacher Collaboration???
What kind of things are they preaching? For Five years, my child is in the school. For five years, I had gone to their open house, received their newsletter and tried to 'communicate' with the teachers, and principals (when I cannot get the teachers). But how many teachers (especially the Chinese teacher, and I still know their names, make my blood boil. NO COLLABORATION, No HUE (do not border at all about the children's welfare!!!! China teacher some more. Well, that is over, but it is definitely going to affect other children!

What is Human Dignity?
Whatever it is, they want to sue me, go ahead, for matters like that! They want to sue me, they are going to lose face as well. I have no money to go through all the lawyers' fees. Go ahead and sue me. What is education? A teacher saying such a thing to a parent? A principal asking the teacher to call on her behalf? She got no guts? (And putting words into my mouth! -- vomit blood! 冤枉 (Yuan Wang = injustice) !!!!! Just because it is words they can anyhow twist and twist and twist what they like to say!!!!

What the school teaches? What the children grow up to be?
And so I can also twist what I say here? But I am not this kind of people. Sue me if you want, I done nothing wrong. What is right and what is wrong? Do the teachers and Principal know themselves? This is called collaboration?

What is EDUCATION?
I tell you, there are lots of things to be said, not only about school, but all around Singapore. Something is obviously wrong with the Education of Singapore, and you can see we are all Products of Singapore. It's a disgrace, utter disgrace, Xia3 Xue2 (disgrace and nothing glamourous).

Teaching The Devil's Child

2008-02-15T11:32:00.000+08:00

This is a continuation from this post, Love Relationship.

What we see is one teacher many students, One mother with a few kids, one boss with a few employees, but there are good students and poor students. There are good children and bad children. There are good employees and bad employees. The good child that walks out of the house may not be a good student, but if he works hard, and he is willing, he would be a good student and ultimately a good employee if he continues to walk in the right path. Having a yardstick in his heart, he should be able to measure what he sees and hear and he should act according to his own judgment.

Regardless of how the mother teaches you and how your teacher said to you, if your heart is not around, there is no way anybody can help you. The kid refuses to open their eyes and hears. They prefer to rest and lead an easy life of comfort. This is the normal human nature, idling and lazing around. But they are habits that will lead the child to destruction ultimately. Many parents do not know what to do. Many parents gave up 'teaching' their kids.

When you think that handling baby is not easy and thought that your life would be easier when your kids grow up, then you might be wrong away. For every stage of the kids' life, there are always challenges ahead. Learning something good is often so hard, and yet learning the bad is not learning at all. The kids just follows what is bad naturally. How to teach a kid well in this case? Gambling is bad. You cannot be bookie, but your father can be bookie. You cannot speak Singlish but your Father speaks Singlish. Children, what are you thinking?

Since my father can do, why can't I? Since I do not get the results I want, I don't try, I don't do anything. TV shows people playing Mahjong. I want to play Mahjong. Maths and Science are boring. Arts is a waste of time when you have computer software to help you colour and paint without creating a mess and hassle of washing up. Don't tell me what to do. I know what to do. You are not always right, but I know what I want. I don't want to be like you.

Children's mind like adults' minds are hard to read. Even psychologist can never be 100% right. But we have brains and we have a pumping heart. With our body and brain, we can develop strategies and ways to win our enemies. Afterall, Life is just another Art. My Life, My Art The creation of God is an art. The making of a movie is an art. Art is all around us. When our love is not reciprocated, they seem to turn into enemies instead. How many parents and children severe their ties and kinship. How many children did not care about their elderly parents once they make their way out of life?

The Cat married the Dog.

One day, all it takes is one day, for me to be broken and shattered. It takes days and months and even years for me to recover, leaving scars, which may or may not be healed. No plastic surgery could be done. One Satan is not enough in the house. What if there is a Satanic Kid in the house? Married the Devil and give birth to the devil's kid. Will there be Peace when there is no peace? Yes, I had learned. I will continue to fight with you. You can never win with war. War will always create war. But not with poison. Learn from nature, Durian, the successful Fruit which so many people are crazy over. It is deadly but not so deadly if you know it well. 以毒攻毒(Yi Du Gong Du) Fighting Poison with Poison. I am going to win the Devil and the little Devil.

Catholic School

2008-01-29T23:00:00.000+08:00

This is Our Lady of Fatima at St. Francis of Assisi Church. Herrick was so lucky to have a chance to attend Catholic education for his kindergarten studies. It was a two year kindergarten schooling and the teachers were Catholic teachers and nuns. They always had prayers before and after classes. They had prayers before snack time. The children were taught and guided by the true words of God in the catholic school environment.

Herrick had no chance to go to a Catholic Primary School after his kindergarten. However, he went to Catholic High Secondary School. I was so proud of him. He was an intelligent child, hardworking and always serious and motivated in his work. Having Catholic based lessons in his school, I believed that had benefited him a lot. Just as what Fr. GnanaPragash Suresh had said in his website at St. Gabriel's Catholic Academy, "An education that has no religious foundation cannot achieve the task of educating the youth successfully. It is destined to fail. Music without sacred music, architecture minus cathedral, or painting without the scriptural themes would be incomplete. The fact is that nearly everything which gives meaning to life is saturated with religious influences. One can hardly respect a system of education which would leave the student wholly ignorant of the religious basis of education."

I feel that education is never complete without the knowledge of God. Students need to know the existence of life, the creation of life and be guided and the God's way of life. In the school, lots of emphasize is placed on academic results. Children learn English, Maths, Science, Mother Tongue, Social Studies, History, Arts, Geography and so on. The school fails to 'tell' the children, the real meaning of life, the reasons why they need to study and to live. From the time they are stepped into the class, they are taught only the subjects they need to learn in school. My brother and sister stopped schooling many years back. The teacher could not answer the children's question. Someone asked the teacher,"Where life come from?" The teacher could not answer many questions about Life, but only know how to teach reading, writing, and arithmetic.

Children just hate to go to school when they do not see the reasons why they should go to school and when there are so many 'problems' they faced in school (look at the snapshot above). Without the proper guidance from the start, teenagers will never find faith and the real meaning of life, not even the current teachers (which were being raised by our own educational system). There are not many Catholic or religious school, but I think that religious studies should at least be introduced early in school.

Children who are taught the proper 'pillar' of life, with God's words, will grow in faith and strength of character. Luckily there are school like St. Gabriel's Catholic Academy, which offer online courses at affordable tuition to educate children in the proper path, intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. St. Gabriel's Catholic Academy is a nationally accredited school with experienced teachers staffed to help students. With their thoroughly Biblically-based Catholic home schooling education, their students will be have developed an appreciation of truth and beauty in the fine arts as well as the ability to face the real world upon graduation.

Our Precious Children

2007-12-30T11:54:00.000+08:00

Wrong Perception
My sister always said my mother, my father, my brothers all do not love her. She said everybody don't like her. She said my parents and my brother loves me more. Well, I do not agree with that. She is a mother herself. She should know better. I have two children myself. Two children, two different characters and personality and intelligence. For that, how to treat all the children the same way when they are all different? When we spend more time on one child, does it mean that we do not love the other child?

Conception to Delivery , Long Process, Hard To Come By
I always envied those people who are pregnant and yet they are able to walk around 'freely'. They have no morning sickness and they seem to have no pain at all. When I was pregnant, I had to lie in bed, I felt nauseous all the time, even up to the seventh month! I had to quit my jobs for each time I was pregnant. It was a nightmare to be pregnant. Thinking back, I am really scared to be pregnant!

Torture, Nightmare
So my children were with me for nine months, just like any other mothers with their babies. If some mothers do not have morning sickness, at least they have inconveniences like carrying a big tummy around. These are not easy. Many sacrifices the pregnant women have to bare too.

NOTHING IS EASY
The day finally arrived when the water bag burst and you have to go hospital. In shows, you often see water bag burst and people have to give birth in lifts and cars and so on. But in reality, there are so much time left for you to get ready. Of course there are always exceptional cases. So for both my kids, they was born in the hospital. I walked into the hospital myself, with my dearest hubby. He did all the registration for me at the hospital and next, I was pushed into the delivery suite. Things were not like the TV. TV are all bullshits. If you see what is reality in TV, you would not want to watch TV!

No Pain No Gain
Delivery is pain and scary. After delivery, it is another kind of pain and torture. It is no fun at all to be pregnant and to give birth. It is no fun at all to go hospital. But I had sacrificed. I exchanged my time, my career, my body, my spirit, to have a LIFE. I bring ANOTHER LIFE to this world. It is such a strange thing. Once they are out from your body, they can never go back.

Every Production Is Valuable
Have you had any painting before? Do you not take time to produce a good painting? Do you spend a lot of time with your energy and brain juice, to create your masterpiece? Do you produce only one piece of art in your life? Definitely you would have more. Tell me, which one of the art do you like best? Would you say you do not like any one of your own productions and you just dump them away?

Your Arts no matter how real will never come to LIVE
Our arts can be dump one side and be forgotten if they are finally something which you think they are not your 'masterpieces'. That depends on how you had put in your efforts and your time. Only you yourself know best. But if you have put in all your might and all your best, surely, that is your best. Would you not treasure it? What if this is LIFE? Wouldn't that be even more treasurable or precious? There is no need to think the babies are from which mother. Just think of this logic and you think for yourself, are there mothers in this world who would not love their children? Would a mother not love their children even if the child is of lower intelligence than the normal people? Which mother would not want their children to be smart? But if there are no choice, God had given them these gifts of LIFE, can they changed their genes?

Meaning Of Mother??
I do not know all the mothers in this world. But I have met mothers, I have my own mother and related mother (mother-in-law), and I am a mother myself. My children are like poles apart at certain things, but certain things they are so alike. Each of them have their own strengths and weaknesses. More strength or more weaknesses? That depends on how you look at things. Regardless of their intelligence, they always call you 'mummy' or 'mother'. Can you not love your own production, when they still call you 'mummy' even if your kid is of mental handicap or the ugliest in the world?

You Don't Teach only in the classroom
Parenting are never easy. When you feel that you have done something GOOD for the children, do you really think it is good for the children (or is it something which you could feel better for yourself). Children also have their own dreams and own desire. By 'forcing' them to do things which they do not want, is it caring for them? There are so many things to ask about Parenting. Regardless of what the parents teach, the results that the parents get is always different. This is just like teaching in the classroom.

My parents, my brothers and sister are my teachers too
My mother has 4 children. But each of the 4 children all have different results today. My sister always say my mother, my father and my brother love me most. Nobody like her. I asked her, which of her two children she likes most? Is it not the same? All her children are always her children and will she hate any child? Will she not protect any of her child? Even now, her children are teenagers now. But in her eyes, they are always her child, her kids, forever need the care and concern of the mother! Which mother will not care about the child even if the mother scold or cane him/her?

We all learn from one another, not trying to HURT one another
I had written about my children's school. The school is not happy that I wrote about them. But that is my real concern and I am SURE all parents would want their CHILDREN to be safe in schools and ALL our children are PRECIOUS to us. Don't you think so? If all children are not precious, who are living on this earth tomorrow? If your children are not precious, why people would want to buy them? I would not sell my children, and I hope that the school will teach my children well and protect my children too.

Parent Expectation of The School

2007-12-29T00:12:00.000+08:00

I do not care if your customer service is good or bad. I do not care if your general office people never do their work properly. All I am concern is my children in the school. I am not asking for trouble, making things difficult for any teachers either. I have no time to do that either. But my concern is all to know about my children's PROGRESS and ATTITUDE in school. On top of that, I just want my children to be safe. Safe from mishap and misfortunes.

The title of my post is PARENT expectation and not Parents. This is my expectation, but I had tuition with Valerie. Her mother was as concerned as me for her daughter's progress and attitude during tuition. As her tuition teacher, I was frustrated when I had so many things to teach and her foundation was weak. I only had one to two months to teach her. I had so many things to do, but I had to 'devote' myself to her. But I had to face it, I put myself in the mother's shoes and I put myself in Valerie's shoes and I tried to do my best. I never say I am great, I never say I am smart. But to do something well, you have to have the right attitude and be willing to learn and admit your mistakes.

Which teacher was the main target? Not all the teachers are bad. If all teachers are bad, then who am I? You think I am an angel? There are always the first time and the brand new days where the young ones learn. How do you accept feedback or criticism? Do you admit your fault, the teacher concerned? She was obviously not someone experienced, but for teaching Primary two, I am fine with that, but please these are my concern:

WHAT THE SCHOOL SHOULD EMPHASIZE
1. Teachers on duty Marking children's book
Teachers suppose to be on duty during recess time to look after children. They are stationed at different places of the school. Some teachers did not 'watch out' for the children. They spent this time marking books.

2. Teachers who do not care about Children's Feedback
My children told the teacher when they did not receive some worksheets as they were absent from school. These include the chinese magazine subscriptions. Instead of listening to them, my child was rebuked for not bringing them to school. I wrote in the handbook, NO USE. TALKED to teacher, NO USE. WRITE ON BLOGS, now say why never tell the PRINCIPAL.
WHEN the SINGH was the principal, I had a minor complaint. I want to talk to her. There were screening and I never managed to get through. As with any other government bodies, you never get to speak to IMPORTANT PEOPLE. So I write on my own blogs, MY OWN collection. If you see it, you read, you know. If you want to IMPROVE, I am very glad. If you treat it as an ATTACK at you, what is a school? WE all want the children to do well, but I am voicing out my concern. No parents would want their children to be in this state above!

When children told you something, like the boys doing something to the girls, did you take note of that? (This is just example) I do not want future incidence to happen to my children in school where the boys 'molest' her. Of course, the teachers have no control of that, but such things if you know, please inform parents, then parents would know why the children are so sad, or not themselves when they reach home.

3. Make sure the student handbook or whatever book you want it to be called -- the book for parents and teachers to communicate-- FILLED up EVERYDAY, when there are homework or any concern the teachers need to inform the parents and vice versa. This could be a consistent habit RIGHT From the start of school term. Everyday before school is dismissed, teacher gives the children TIME to write everything down. When pupil forget anything or need particular attention from parents to help, teachers please write down. Next, teacher walks round the pupils, go round checking all the book. This could take about 5-15 minutes, you just need to put aside SOME TIME.

By spending 15 minutes of your time, you can have more peace, the parents will not "HAUNT" you.

4. CONTACTS, EMAILS
AT the start of the school term, give parents your contact number. It does not have to be phone number. All we want is COMMUNICATION. Any communication that can answer our doubts. EMails are fine, and any emails, as long as YOU REPLY.

5. HONESTY
Please do not tell children that when you leave teaching is because the class is NAUGHTY. The children NAUGHTY you do not want to teach them anymore. We know that there are so many trainee teachers now. Some come and some go to NIE for training and attachment and whatever. Please do not tell children THINGS WHICH YOU DO NOT KNOW either. Giving FALSE INFORMATION. You are misleading the children. But that is not as bad as telling nonsense like you are leaving because the class is NAUGHTY.

Sometimes teachers make mistakes. Teachers are not God and they know EVERYTHING. But What is a teacher if you are not honest to yourself? What are you imparting to your students?
Teaching is not so easy as only telling students what to do and telling them how to do English, Maths and Science! You need to do more than you deserve the paycheck!

6. Impartial
If YOU are scared that your name will be published, and you are scared to teach my children, then you are NOT FIT to be a teacher. What is a teacher? DO YOU really know what is a teacher? If you are teaching the Lee whatever Long children or whatever tong son or whatever LEVIS, are you going to be stressed everyday and quit teaching just because of that? Or are you going to teach the class, but pay extra emphasize on that particular 'precious kid', everyday having fear that his parents will come after you? If you are going to do that, then you are going to have a hard time teaching and you will not be able to teach the class well. You can be a honour students, but that does not mean that you can teach well. You can only have a A-level certificate, but your teaching is much more superb than the honour students! Regardless of your educational level, teaching is a skill like any other profession need. The hairdresser has cutting skills, the surgeon have cutting skills, the way to hold a scalpel and similarly teaching. But if you are willing to learn and you are committed, who will not give you a chance?

This is absolutely absurd to say that TEACHERS MORALE are at risk because of what I said. If the teachers are good teachers, they will always strive to be better. They welcome feedback and suggestions. If the teachers are working NOT JUST FOR MONEY, but because they love teaching and they CARE for the children, they would not be bordered by who the parents are. Do your job well and do you have to fear who is behind you? Do you teach well only when the invigilators or examiners are around? Can you be clear of your own conscience when you are playing injustice and any sense of biases to any of the children in your class? Ask yourself, do you treat the children with uneducated parents similarly to children with Fussy Parent like me? If you treat the children differently, something is wrong with your attitude. Regardless of how the parents treated me, I treat the children as CHILDREN. I do not show favouritism to a kid just because he is the Principal's son or daughter. I do not pay lesser attention to the kid with uneducated parents either. At the end of the day, do you think you will be happy teaching if you must teach with so many types of concern from your heart? Every students go to school to learn. All children are STILL CHILDREN. Regardless of what their parents do, they are innocent. If you really Care for the children and you want to teach the children, you would know that.

Teachers MUST KNOW FIRST AID

2007-12-28T23:07:00.000+08:00

ANY Parents want this to happen to your kids?
This was the photograph of the primary two girl who had her eyes injured in school. This incident happened during November this year, when the students were in the hall, and the teachers were busy preparing for Annual Speech Prize Giving Day or whatever preparation of Report Books for the students. I had captured this photograph from The New Paper. The exact date I am not sure, but I remembered the day was one of the Saturday and the children went for Catechism at St Anthony Church. So the date must be either 3 November 2007 or 10th November 2007.

NO HYPERLINK, I respect You
For writing a complaints about Teacher on my blog, my intentions was not to hurt any teacher. My intentions is to create awareness, and hope that IMPROVEMENTs can be made in this area. I DO NOT want to see such things happen to my CHILDREN. NO parents would want this to happen to their children. It is not a matter of apologies and giving MONEY after that which will appease us nor solve the pain after that. This poor girl was told by the doctor that she could possible be blind after that.

Just TO Be Caution
When the incident happen, the teacher called the parents or guardian, whatever. The school told them that the girl was fine. But when the grandparent went to fetch the girl in the school later in the afternoon, the girl was in pain. The grandma sent her to polyclinic(if I am not wrong). At the polyclinic, the doctor told the grandma "Are you mad, you sent her only now?" She should be sent earlier!! But who knew it? The school said the girl was fine. The teacher THOUGHT she WAS fine.

Better Safe To Be Sorry Later On
So what if the teachers showed concerned after that? So what if the Principal or Vice principal went to the hospital and stay there for as long as they want? NO AMOUNT of money and apologies will ever AMEND such a MISTAKES, negligence on the teachers part. We do not say that the teachers should be responsible. But were the teachers BUSY chatting, writing report books or doing other tasks? Fine, no body will admit these. Then after accident happen, did you check thoroughly? If the teacher had done so, the parents would have gone to the school sooner and the girl's eye might not have more serious infection.

NO POINT BLAMING After that
What we want is our children to be cared for and not only to go there for education. The school teaches English, Maths, Science, Chinese/Malay/Tamil(Mother Tongue), Health Education, Social Studies, Music and Arts. Does it mean that you do not care about the welfare of students but only academic performance? When you can teach Health Education, can you not know basic First Aid and some Health Knowledge like handling emergency cases? Does the school has any standard operating procedure for that? My child was hit on the nose bridge, in between the eyes and nose, and I WAS NOT INFORMED!!!!! She had fever and sore eyes after that. Was that coincidence?? The Vice Principle said that was a SEASON of Sore EYEs. Fine. So now the SEASON is over, the sore eyes SEASON was never last year as from birth until now, but so COINCIDENTALLY that period.

Which Profession IS EASY?
When accidents happen, we DO NOT want to BLAME people. It is no use. It is a waste of time and unproductive too. But DO WE need to wait UNTIL something happen like this case above then the school start to THINK of something to solve FUTURE similar or WORST case? Already we have students committing SUICIDE after teachers 'talked' to the students about certain matters. How the students die, the parents would not know the details! Can Parents trust the school? What is the purpose of sending our children to school?

Put Yourself In Other People's Shoes
I am not talking about OVER PROTECTION of my kids. Today my children cooked Maggie Noodles. I on the gas cooker and they did all the cooking. I have no time to teach my children so many things, though I WANT TO. I WANT TO spend more time with my children, but I have to earn money too. I cannot afford to suffer similar fate like this case above. I will regret my whole life! No Parents mentioned about this does not mean that ALL parents are satisfied with the school system.

Do you need to have FOOD POISONING to stop production of Cakes?
AS Parent, I want my children to study in school but to be safe too. Shouldn't all the teachers learn FIRST AID and how to handle emergency like resuscitation and nose bleeding, choking, asthmatic attack and things like that. Primary students and secondary students are not big adults like University students or Polytechnic students. They need the guidance and care from Teachers and Parents still.

EDUCATE The Teachers
Teachers were sent to improve their teaching skills, but how about this aspect? All you care for is academic results. It is not easy to be teachers. If you think teaching is very easy money, be prepared to handle fussy parents like me, if you think I AM FUSSY. But I tell you, we all want the children to be better(just like you said so nicely in newsletter, in open house, teacher and parents collaboration, but DID THEY?). If you really care about the children, you would cooperate with me, teachers. IF your concern is only to earn the monthly easy paycheck, then the children are at risk. The future of the children lies in your hands. It is not a matter of going to school everyday, staying in the class and teaching the class, you are being responsible. There are more to teaching than merely standing there.

Is MONEY the PROBLEM or CHILDREN YOUR CONCERN?
PRICE HIKE, Teachers Pay increase. WHO ARE PAYING YOU? WE pay school fees and we want our children to be SAFE in your hands, in your school compounds. ARE WE asking too much? Accidents like that above could have been avoided if there are teachers around. If teachers are teaching or with the students, can that happen?

Teachers are not GOD, Teachers are not EVERYHING 'Bao kao liao' (everything know)
As a teacher, sometimes we need to leave the class alone to get something done, that is understandable -- but not too long, and PLEASE when accidents happen, NOTIFY parents. DO THE NECESSARY FIRST AID you deem right. When you are on duty, do not mark books. Treat the children as though they are your children. DO NOT discriminate children just because their PARENTS are bloggers. Who will dare to teach my kids? I will tell you another post on that.

12 Rules of Parenting

2007-12-27T16:38:00.000+08:00

Adults often tell children,"Grow up." Perhaps one of the wisest things adults can do is to 'grow down' -- to do or say something from time to time, as children frequently do, that makes little or no sense. ~ Allen Klein

Twelve Rules That Don't Changes

1. Don't disapprove of what a child is -- disapprove of the actions.

2. Give attention and praise for good behaviour, not for bad behaviour.

3. Parents should allow and encourage discussion, but the parent makes the final decision.

4. Punishment should be reasonable and related to the offense.

5. Throw out all rules that you are unwilling to enforce, and be willing to change rules if you think it reasonable to do so.

6. Don't lecture and don't warn. Youngsters can remember things they think are important to remember.

7. Don't feel you have to justify rules, although you should be willing to explain them.

8. As your youngsters get old, many rules may be flexible and subject to discussion and compromise. However, on those few rules you really feel strongly about, enforce them even if other parents have a different rule.

9. Allow the child or youth to assume responsibility for decisions as he or she shows the ability to do so.

10. Don't expect children to show more self-control than you do as a parent.

11. Be honest with your youngster -- hypocrisy shows.

12. The most important thing in your youngster's self-image is what he or she thinks you think. Self-image is a major factor in how the youngster thinks and what he or she does.

Encourage your child to use his or her creativity. Often, the simplest idea can blossom into an hour's entertainment. All that is needed is a supportive adult (with a sense of humour), a suggestion or two, and a child's imagination. ~ Leslie Hamilton

Tuition For Kids

2007-12-03T20:30:00.000+08:00

Today Valerie came to my house for tuition. Just October she had finished her Secondary One examinations and now I am teaching her Secondary Two's Maths. Time really flies.

I started giving tuition when I had completed my GCE 'O' level. While waiting for results, I started home tuition. Being green and new in the working society, I signed up as tutor in various tuition agencies during those days. The tuition agencies will match your requirements with available students. If they had any opportunities, they would call me. I had some assignments and soon I was visiting homes, giving private home tuition to kids. It was not worthwhile to register with tuition agencies. At the end of the month, I need to pay the tuition agencies 50% of my earnings, the tuition fees.

Soon, I start my own home tuition services. I printed flyers and I went to various blocks around my neighbourhood to give out flyers. My niece and nephew were very small. They gave me a helping hand too. During those days, I received many phone calls. Soon, my schedule was very tight. I had groups of tuition, both at home and visiting homes.

I stopped tuition when I was in the college. After GCE 'A' Level was finished, I had relief teaching in the schools. I had private tuition again. During universities day, I had relief teaching also whenever there are opportunities. Throughout my universities' day, I had group tuition for kids at home. They were mostly Primary Kids. But I have a few Secondary Kids too.

This is a photo taken from my tuition file.

There are so many tuition agencies now. There are many online tutoring too. Looking for a tutor is just so easy now. Students do not have to travel far as well. There are tuition centres at the void deck of many HDB flats and shopping centres. Nowadays with technology being so advanced, there are online tutor whereby student and tutor can have tuition session at their own home. This is very similar to video conferencing.

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Love Your Child

2007-12-02T20:41:00.000+08:00

To encourage children to be truthful, you need to be truthful. To encourage children to listen to you, spend time listening to their views and concerns instead of telling them all your views all the time. Every child is born with some inherent traits. These can affect the way he reacts to people, events and stress. For most children, stress from the environment comes primarily from home and school. A child will experience less stress if his relationship with significant people is warm, loving, accepting and affirming. We often think that we can show love to our children by buying them things or simply spending time and teaching them. However, are we meeting their needs? Sometimes we do not know what their needs are.

Some examples of children's needs are:

To be independent, to do things for themselves.
To be heard where their views and feelings are concerned.
To have the right to privacy and personal space.
To be able to choose and be with their friends.

There is nothing more satisfying to a child than feel his parents' approval for and their pride in his abilities. Talk with your child. Teach your child problem-solving skills. Respect your children, show them that they are important people. For example, listen to your child and talk to him about his feelings. By paying attention to and talking about his feelings, you are sending your child the message that you really want to understand him. Love Your Child.

Parents-Teachers Communication

2007-10-09T23:55:00.000+08:00

These are student handbooks from my children's school. I was reluctant to buy them at the beginning of this year because I thought they were a waste of money. However, this year, I had applied for free textbooks. My children's application was approved and this solve my problem.

The student handbook was meant to be a way of communication between the parents and teachers. Why do parents and teachers need to communicate? How can a teacher alone teach a class of so many pupils? It takes the co-operation of the parents to assist their children in their schoolwork as well, and not totally relying on the teacher alone. But how can the parent know anything if the teacher does not convey anything to the parents? In the past, there are no student handbooks. Teachers need to call up parents. Parents need to call up the schools and talk to teachers. This is very time consuming. So the school thought of this book, to solve the problems of teachers and parents communication system. Some teachers even give email address to parents nowadays. Still, some teachers, but rarely, give their handphone numbers to their students!

Regardless of the method, all we want is just to make sure that our children are serious in their school work -- do their homework, hand in their homework in time and learn their spelling, and be notified of important dates, important events and any accidents or injuries in school.

But things are not so easy. Having this book does not mean that problems are solved. Does the teacher take it seriously? Does the teacher know the importance of communication? Does the teacher really CARE in the first place? Well, I doubt so. I had called, I had written, and I had spoken to the teacher concerned, but it was no use. I shall dealt upon this in another post.

Ricsson's student handbook 2005

Ricsson's Student Handbook 2006

Clara's Student Handbook 2007

The student handbook is done very well, with a column for teacher/parents remarks and another column for students to write down their homework or important notes. Inside the handbooks are school rules, important formulas, planners, time-table and goals setting for the students.

I must say the previous teachers were good. They had urged the students to write down their homework in the students' handbook. They even ask the class to set goals prior to examinations. This teacher never fail to respond to me whenever I have any questions. She is responsible and her attitude is very good.

Things were not the same after a change of Principal at QiHua Primary School. The teachers that I come across ever since the change, were not as good as before. Students handbook was always 'empty' even though there were homework. I see my children's work sometimes not handed in, and at times the Chinese teacher even write in the Chinese Textbook to 'talk' to me -- telling me to 'supervise' my child's work.

No teacher ever write any remarks on the student handbooks when they needed to. I do not even know what the children's homework and spelling are and how am I supposed to guide them? When told the teacher about that, nothing was changed. She cannot be bothered about it. This is irresponsible and uncaring teacher who are paid their monthly salary whether or not they did a good job.

Learn From Experience

2007-09-20T07:40:00.000+08:00

Children will not know how adorable a dog is and how much happiness they can have if they do not have a dog at home or if they have not come across a dog at all.

Experience is the best teacher. You can tell a child millions of truths, facts and many many more advice. Not many children will listen to what you say; in other words, many children do not heed your advice nor believe what you say. This is from my own experience, as a tuition teacher, as a school teacher, and as a student before and as a parent of two children now.

I started giving full-time tuition as soon as my GCE 'O' Level examination ends. While waiting for the results to be out in three months time, I had sourced for students myself. I gave relief-teaching and home tuition to individuals and to groups of students. From that time onwards, I had been giving tuition even after I was an undergraduate. After I graduated, I worked in a tuition agency for a short while before I had my full-time job. After which, I gave part-time tuition to a group of students who came to my house. I had stopped giving tuition after I had two children.

Parenting involves discipling, raising and teaching my own children, is a time-consuming process. In addition, I have to work. This make parenting even tougher, considering all the stress and time constraint we have. Knowledge and practical is always so different and we all know that all children are different and there are so many ways of handling each and every of the child. Having knowledge of parenting does not make you a good parent. You can be a better parent if you practice what you know. It sound easy than to practice it. Nowadays, in this competitive society where paper qualification is so important, the norm for parents are academic results. Parents are always concern about their children's results. Everyday the child must be seen doing homework, studying and doing assessment books or test papers.

How many children have their time-table and actually follow it? You may 'force' the children to do it. You may tell your children or the students what are the advantages of studying and so on. They would not know the importance of anything if they have no experience of it. For example, you can tell the child what is pain, what is fire, how fire can destroy things and burn their finger. All these will be forgotten the moment you stop talking and leave them alone. But a child who witness fire burning a house, a child who was burnt at her finger while playing with fire, will know what is pain and what is fire and how fire can injure his finger and damage her surrounding. This is called learning from experience. It is far better than you tell the child so many things. When the child learn from experience, they can write better in their essays, term papers or in their composition. This definitely help the children in their English writings and Second Language or Mother Tongue Writings in schools.

In addition to writing, the children will be tested on oral and aural in school. Learning from experience enable them to speak from experience and therefore write better based on experience. Experience help the child to understand better. It is helpful in Science as well. It helps the child to think and understand.

The ultimate aim of all students is to sit for examination. There are projects, written test and oral, aural part to the examination. However, not all children can experience everything in this world. For this reason, it is hard for a children to know everything. There are time where a child is given a topic to write on, but they simply cannot produce anything because they have no experience of it. What to do? Besides doing research yourself, another easy way out is to have Custom Writing Services. Custom-Writing.org offers professional writing assistance for students all over the world. They write essays, term papers, research papers, dissertations, theses and other academic assignment. They have experienced UK and US writers, 24/7 live support, free unlimited revisions and free plagiarism report for each order. Custom Writing provides writing to any field of study. More information can be found on their website.

Writing is the only way to test what a student knows and understand about a particular subject and topic of discussion. Whichever level a student is, writing in the form of essays, term papers, research papers and theses and so on, are ways of testing a student's knowledge. Some students have difficulties in writing. Getting ideas are difficult for them. Learn from others, order custom term papers at Custom-Writing.org! Learn from Experience -- Reading is another experience! Read custom writings by professional writers and you can excel too!

By playing, children gain experience. Children at play is children at study. Children gain more experience and learn better when they act more than listening alone.

Academic Performance of Children

2007-09-13T23:50:00.000+08:00

All parents want their children to score well in their examinations. No parents would love to see their children fail. Examinations are coming. Any parents who love their children would naturally be worried about their children's academic results. That is why Valerie has come to my house for tuition as well.

I am worried about my children's results too. My children are not top achievers. They do not have very good results too. I am very worried and anxious about their examination results. I had to do my work and I had to coach them. Children are naturally playful and human beings are not 'robots'. Remember when we were young, I think we are much luckier in a way though many times, Richard told the children, "You are so lucky to have computers games.". Well, during our time, our studies workload during schooldays were not as heavy as now. During our time, back in the 1960s to 1970s, school days were not so hectic as now. I think we were more fortunate that we are more 'carefree' in the sense that education system was much more 'slower pace', this means that teachers were not stressful as well. For not being stressful, teachers can really inculcate the young with virtues and important values of life. In having a 'lighter syllabus and thus workload, teachers were able to instill not only knowledge but important moral education to the children. Nowadays, more emphasis are placed on results. Everybody want to see good results. Who will care about virtues and place more emphasis on moral education? These are subjects that are not tested, and they are always placed way down the list of priorities when it comes to teaching. When teachers are far behind the syllabus, they would 'steal' the time for moral and civic education and even art and crafts lesson, to cover up on what the class had missed or far behind from time.

Children today had lesser time to play. They had to attend private tuition, extra courses or lessons so as to achieve excellence in their life. This is especially so for children who have parents who can afford to nurture their children in every aspects. These children will naturally grow up to be bright students. But what about parents who cannot afford to send children for extra courses and private tuition? These children have only the school to rely on. The school is the only place where they learn new knowledge and new skills. Children with illiterate parents can only rely on the school and themselves. Children with educated but busy parents( and cannot afford to send them for extra courses and private tuition) are not much better than those with illiterate parents. These children will have progressive results deterioration if they never attempt to work hard or if they have difficulties understanding what their teachers are teaching in class.

For children who fail to understand what the teachers said and taught in class right from the start, it is very hard for the children to have interest in the particular subject which he or she is weak in. To produce good results during examination or anything, it takes consistency in daily performance. There is no instant miracle in education. Take the instance of Valerie, she is weak in her Mathematics. I had not taught her before at all, not even in her Primary School. Now that she is in Secondary One, and now it is September. Final-Year-Examination is just three weeks away. One week ago, she started tuition, as requested by her mother. Ever since the start of tuition, her mother had called me everyday to ask about Valerie's progress. I had explained everything to her, same thing every day and she asked the same thing everyday. Tuition was supposed to be scheduled twice a week, 1.5 hourly each time, but I always extend until 2 hours. However, parents are always worried and 'kiasu'(scared to lose) when it comes to children's education. They had requested to three days, four hourly, and now it is moving towards daily, even on weekends.

Today, I can see Valerie is so tired. I am also tired. I wake up early, I have many tasks to do, but I put aside, as I always believe in being responsible. What I planned to do with her and what I planned to teach her I will always try to finish up with her even though it might exceed the time. I am not so particular about all these. But her parents seem to be 'pressurizing' her and me. Everyday, reporting to the parents about her progress. I can see that Valerie does not feel good too. I can understand how she feel as I was a student before. I had been a teacher before. I understand how it is like to be 'sandwiched'.

Results are not everything. So what if you scored distinction and straight As? It is not going to guarantee you anything in life. Results are not everything. Pressurizing your children, depriving them of rest and play, might do them no good in the end. There are saturation point when it comes to learning too. No one is a robot. We are made of flesh. Children need respect, care and our understanding too. Not all children are born 'bright'. Different children have different capabilities and interest. As long as they put in effort, whether they pass or fail, there are always room for further improvement. Though we may feel angry with them for scoring bad results, but put yourself in their shoes. Who want to score poor results? We as parents, can see for ourselves, whether our children have put in their effort. If they had tried their best, we should give time time to improve. Tuition only started a week ago, from Maths failure to Maths Distinction or Merits can be hard, unless there is really miracle -- provided the child keep practicing and practicing Maths. However, how much percent chance of miracle are there when a child need to master 2 textbooks, all within one week or even two weeks of tuition? There is really no miracle in studies. To reach any destination, there is only one step at a time. If you take too many steps, you need to expend more energy. If you are willing to put in more energy and you are willing to sweat, you will surely reach your destination faster. But when no journey was ever been planned, to start a journey to a destination suddenly, and to reach it within a day is impossible. To reach the destination sooner, you have to double up. Check here for correct method of learning and study skills.

World of Imagination

2007-08-10T15:07:00.000+08:00

Children live in their world of imagination. A creative child is a child who is able to imagine. Imagination is the gateway to learning, discoveries and even various inventions in the world. Without imagination, nothing much would have been accomplished.

Bringing up children is a challenging voyage. Every parents are trying hard to provide responsible and balanced care for their children. However, there are times where spouses differ in their parenting style and their opinions differ when it comes to raising their children. This is definitely so, for my own family. My parents hardly buy toys for me. They believe that toys are a waste of money. My husband also shares the same kind of 'old-thinking' as the old-generation thinking. His mother, which is my mother-in-law, did not buy any toys for her children at all. I think this is a very big mistake for any parents to be made.

Though my parents were reluctant to buy toys, I still had my way and I managed to have most of my favourite toys and games. I believe that toys and plays can really do wonders for children. To the children, the toys allow them to imitate their favourite cartoon characters and even their soccer idols or any other TV stars. Through their own imagination and own play, they learn how to co-ordinate their body movements, they learn speech and interactions with their playmates. Toys are even more important when there are no playmates. To a lonely child who plays on their own, they use their own 'self-language' -- talking to themselves, reply, asking, etc impersonating different roles for their own plays. This is so for my son when my daughter goes to school and he is left alone.

I would not want to save money on toys. Anything which can help to nurture the mind of the children and bring them more self-confidence and self-esteem, I will not try to save. By observing your child and interacting with your children, you will know what your children like and dislike. Build a close relationship with your children. Show them your love through hugs and kisses and also through playing together.

Acting out a role is a powerful way of instilling values to your children. Taking up a role helps the child to experience the feelings and thoughts of the character. This helps to develop understanding on the part of the child. Before playing or after play, we can also talk to our children about certain movie shows or television shows. Topics which can be discussed includes things like what they like and dislike about the characters in the show. The children can get to choose which character they would like to act upon.

Children loves to wear costumes and fanciful clothes when playing. They love to imitate their favourite idols or they just want to be something great. I'd bought the set of costumes some years back. Until now, these costumes have been the children's favourite 'toys'. One night, I caught my daughter and my son putting on the costumes again, playing in their room, having so much fun. That was their imagination at play. The costumes become their pajamas for that night. After they were tired, they went to bed.

Do you know that your child can be the next Micheal Owen, Ronaldinho or David Beckham? The most recent news is that of Rhain Davis. Rhain Davis is a nine-year-old recent recruit for Manchester United's academy. He is now the talk of football. The world's most famous soccer club - Manchester United - has invited him to join Manchester United's famed academy, the breeding ground of current Red Devils' star Ryan Giggs and 1966 World Cup-winning England hero Bobby Charlton. Your child can be as intelligent and smart as Rhain Davis if you give him the right kind of motivation and encouragement. To any child who is a soccer fan and loves football, Franklin NFL Uniform Sets at NFLuniformset.com markets National Football League Helmet and Uniform Sets that are geared for children ages 4 to 10 years old.

Children often love to wear their favourite costumes to bed, just like my children. Franklin NFL Uniform Sets can be used as Kids Pajamas or as normal daily costumes for child plays as and when the child's imagination is at work. Halloween is coming soon and perhaps, NFL Football uniforms can be your child Kids Halloween Costumes. NFL Football uniforms make great kids pajamas and the children can use them to play as and when they like. Let your children's imagination run wild with NFL Football uniforms!

Through play, children talk more and they can spent hours playing, losing themselves in the world of their imagination. For parents who need a break from busy work, letting their children play on their own is a great peace of mind. Through playing, children use their imagination and they can grow up to be more creative. Through playing, they can learn social skills, language skills and also develop self-confidence. So toys are not a waste of money for children. Toys are necessary for the healthy development of every children.

Discouraged Children

2007-08-03T21:23:00.000+08:00

According to Dr. Maurice Balson, the former head of the Monash Parent Teacher Education Center, the most important principle which a parent should learn is this: A misbehaving child is a discouraged child.

Effect of Discouragement on Children
Behind all forms of inadequate and disturbing behaviour are discouraged children who feel that, as they are now, they are not much good. To be a child means that you are smaller, weaker, less able, slower, and more inexperienced than all adults and older children. Naturally they cannot do things as well as more experienced parents, older children and siblings. Yet many parents refuse to accept children's current levels of performance and constantly dwell on their imperfections and shortcomings. While all children are capable of improving, our focus on their deficiencies is disastrous and has the effect of providing further discouragement which hinders subsequent improvement.

As a result, many children give up in despair because they feel that they cannot be as good as their parents want them to be or as good as other children. They lose faith in their ability to cope with the learning demands of the various situations and turn to inadequate behaviour in their attempt to salvage some semblance of respect and self-esteem.

To help children believe in themselves is the basic task of the parent. Every child who fails to make satisfactory progress in meeting the demands of living -- schooling, friendship and neighbourhood, reflects early discouragement and a lack of co-operation in the family. For children who need homework help, tutorvista.com is a world class online tutoring which provide K-12 and college tutoring, supplementary education, homework help and test prep. Parents who needs English, Maths and Science or even other subjects tutoring for their children may visit tutorvista.com for more details.

The basic motivation behind all behaviour is the wish to belong, to feel accepted, to be able to play a constructive role in the group. Only when children feel that they belong to the family, that they are useful and important members of it, can they function adequately, contribute, and co-operate. All initial behaviour of young children is viewed as their attempt to find their place within the family through constructive activity. They will try to feed themselves, to dress themselves, to amuse themselves, and attempt many other tasks which children must learn. If these initial attempts meet with approval from parents, children have the courage and confidence to continue learning and to tackle the more difficult tasks ahead. However, if these initial behaviours of children of children, imperfect as they must be, meet with frequent criticisms by parents for reasons such as 'too slow', 'too messy', etc, children begin to lose confidence in their ability to learn the tasks expected of them and turn to various forms of misbehaviour because they believe that they cannot belong through constructive activity.

Many individuals hide their sense of inferiority behind exaggerated superiority. Arrogance, boasting, nagging, deprecating others, intense emotions, not listening, conversation about oneself, exaggerated demands on self or others, vanity and unusual dress -- these are signs of inferiority.

All misbehaviour in children has its origin in this basic loss of confidence, in feelings of discouragement, and from the belief that they are not good enough. Children turn to disturbing ways of behaving that will gain them recognition only because they are denied successful learning experiences. Attention, power, revenge, and escape by withdrawal are the only areas open to a discouraged child.

It is important that parents view children's misbehaviour as a product of discouragement rather than as the behaviour of a naughty child, an aggressive child, a lazy child, a spoilt child, or a stupid child. The purposeful nature of these latter behaviours should be clear now but their need arises from a series of discouraging experiences which destroy children's basic belief and confidence in their own abilities. Children are not psychologically sick but are discouraged. They may have difficulties in writing and reading. All these need our time and patience to teach them and help them. By identifying and removing the sources of a child's discouragement we can begin to stimulate a child into more socially acceptable and personally satisfying forms of behaviour.

Love your children with all your hearts, love them enough to discipline them before it is too late. Praise them for important things, even if you have to stretch them a bit. Praise them a lot. They live on it like bread and butter and they need it more than bread and butter. ~ Lavina Christensen Fugal

Celebrations With Costumes

2007-06-10T03:06:00.000+08:00

Celebrations and festivals are special times when people get together to have fun. Festivals are held for many different reasons. For example, birthdays and weddings celebrate the important days in people's lives, New Year celebrates a particular time of the year. All over the world, people celebrate in similar ways. Men, Women, children -- boys and girls wear Moon Costumes to have fun during festive seasons. They exchange presents, decorate their homes and share special meals. People may spend weeks or months preparing for important festivals.

Carnivals are street parades with colourful costumes, music and dancing. Carnivals began long ago, as a celebration held before Lent, a time when many Christian people fasted, or stopped eating certain food. Everyone wanted to enjoy themselves before fasting. Today, carnivals are held just for fun. One of the biggest carnivals in the world takes place in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Many people spend all year designing and making their costumes for the main parade. Musicians play a type of dance music called samba and compete for the title of best song writer. The celebrations go on for several days and there are prizes for the top costumes and dancers.

Do you know that in Venice, Italy, carnival-goers wear beautiful, jewelled costumes and put on masks to hide their faces! To make a carnival mask, cut out a shape from thin card to fit across your eyes and nose. Cut out eye holes, then decorate the mask. Then glue the mask firmly to a stick! Making your own costumes and mask take time. To get instant costumes and mask, Moon Costumes offers a high line of Halloween costumes, cosplay, Halloween props, magic & clown supplies, wigs, masks, decorations and many more. Same-day shipping on most orders placed before 3pm EST.

There are other occasions where people wear costumes as a way of celebration. This is Halloween. Long ago, people in Europe held a festival in autumn, when they believed that ghosts and witches went on the loose. People left out food and drink for them, hoping that they would go away. Later, this festival became known as Halloween. It took its name from All Hallows, the Christian festival for remembering Saints. Today, Halloween is a fun festival held in Europe and in United States of America. Children dress up in scary costumes and make pumpkin lanterns to put in their windows.

In mexican, on the November, Mexican people hold a festival called the Day of the Dead. The evening before, people visit graveyards where their relatives are buried and have a picnic there. Many Mexicans stay by the graves all night. The next day is a public holiday and everyone enjoys a day off work or school. People dress as skeletons and give each other sweets shaped like skulls.

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Loving Your Children

2007-05-11T15:35:00.000+08:00

You can address life as a process of realization about your child by utilizing your heart intelligence. By consciously practicing love, a parent can intuitionally protect and guide the child into the proper angles of perception. Quality heart time is provided to encourage the child, without the head energies that cause excessive overprotection, constant stimulation or nullify your bottom-line boundaries. Be creative; encourage enterprising growth. Respectfully and with love, lead your child into unfamiliar situations.

What is love and from where does it come? People have asked that question for thousands of years. Love and the heart have always been closely related, but only now is science beginning to explain why. People hold feelings of love close to their hearts. Love imparts the loyalty and responsibility a parent feels for a child. Love also brings understanding. A parent who loves a child becomes intuitively aware of that child's needs. Sincere loving by the parent automatically establishes an intuitional field of knowingness between the parent and the child.

In the area of love, the child may sometimes lead the parent, but only when the basic love relationship is already in place. The child is your apprentice in this guild of love. As the parent, your job is to teach intuitive understanding as if it were a science and a skill.

A child develops healthy perceptions and excels if the parent practices being a conscious and consistent model of love. Love is the configuration for effectively communicating with a child of any age. Babies are exceptionally sensitive. They may not comprehend the words, but they hear and feel the love. By acquiring the knowledge to consciously love, parents access a superior intuitional frequency within their own innate intelligence. This quickens the intuitive connection with their baby, toddler, teen, or grown-up child.

Loving parents, by their very nature, provide children with a secure atmosphere in which to perceive life as a series of challenges that build confidence, rather than as a progression of unsolvable problems that destroy self-worth. Most parents love their children, but feel that love isn't enough to raise a child these days.

If our days are stressful and our minds occupied, love hardly has a chance. We assume we are functioning from a loving place, yet persist in subtly or overtly judging our children, our spouses, or ourselves. To love effectively, we must consciously practice addressing life with love. Love can turn around difficult situations that might otherwise blow up.

Experiencing and expressing love are the peak moments of fulfillment in life. How wonderful that love can be experienced through so many feelings and qualities! A child's love for her mom or dad has a safe, secure, calming feeling. Her love for her sister has a different quality. Sisters may argue and fight, but the sisterly feelings is a bond that underlies the ups and downs and is sustained through the years.

Sibling bonding feels different from the love felt for a friend. A good friend's love is there when you need it, but often circumstances and interests take yu and your friends in different directions. Love for the Earth offers yet another feeling, a connection with nature, animals, flowers, trees, the sky, the soil. Feelings of love can be expansive, and compassionate. The bottom line is this -- love embraces, fulfills, and rewards. Without love, prosperity seems incomplete. Most educators and our own common sense agree that a loving environment is the most beneficial for learning. It is love that unfolds the gift of self-empowerment.

A physical and spiritual drive toward growth dwells within all children. Growth challenges a child to depart from the known and travel into the unknown. This implies uncertainty, so movement into the unknown can trigger anxiety. Love allows perceptions of life to unfold in an atmosphere of hope and security. A child, ages zero to seven, who learns to inhabit the Earth in a field of love will not experience the internal suffering we call frustration when moving through difficult passage in life. It's parental love and care that make mastering the early knowledge of motor skills a fun event instead of a growing pain. Providing safe experiences translates as love-in-action for any child. Love prompts parents to re-examine the home climate they provide. Setting boundaries with the heart intuition is solid care that enhances a child's growth pattern. As security is established, a child will self-validate and self-empower.

Learning From Mistakes

2007-05-10T12:19:00.000+08:00

Future successes are built upon the successes of today. We want to praise the efforts of our children, not just the outcomes.

Making mistakes is a part of life. In fact "getting it wrong sometimes" ( a better phrase than 'failure') is a normal part of creativity. We often need to remind both ourselves and our children of this important lesson. Only after children learn to separate a person's behaviour from the person himself can they begin to tolerate the mistakes of others and themselves.

The difference between those who are successful in life, as opposed to those who are not, relates directly to how they deal with failure at an early age. Failure should always be looked at as something temporary, a stepping stone to any eventual success.

In the process of rebounding from setbacks, children can be reminded of their strengths and be encouraged that 'getting it wrong sometimes' has helped many famous people become very successful. After all, Thomas Edison "got it wrong" over ten thousand times when he was inventing the light bulb. Ten thousand times! How is that for persistence? He never thought of himself as a failure. In fact, he once retorted to a well-meaning friend who was offering him consolation, "Why, I have not failed. I've just found ten thousand ways that won't work." Try sharing some of your own experiences of getting it wrong before getting it right.

Teaching our children to be proficient at problem-solving and coming up with innovative solutions begins by reinforcing that behaviour. It's natural and easy to praise children when they are successful. But if they make honest mistakes, be sure to acknowledge your child's resolve to explore new solutions to their problems. This in itself is an important accomplishment for your child.

No problem or temporary difficulty should ever stand in the way of your child's ability to creatively come up with solutions and answers. It is through solving problems that our creative imagination can be exercised. Transforming every problem into an opportunity can become a habit. Our children's confidence soars with the realization that they can rise to every challenge.

Students do not fail, they just give up trying.

Did You Know?
Formulas For Scoring "A's
According to the College Board 2006 Profile Report analysis of SAT scores, students from wealthier families typically receive higher marks. Is there any secret formulas that all successful students use to minimise their study time but maximise their results? Here are some secret formulas:

1. Be Consistent
Students must be consistent in learning their schoolwork throughout their school year -- be sure that they fully understood a topic that was taught. If they were not sure about anything, it is important that they find out the answers straight away. Small actions over time bring huge results. Students who are consistent in their work would hardly need to spend much time studying for exams. They have spread out their learning time throughout the year -- when the exams are near, they have almost learnt everything. They only need to spend minimal time doing some extra practice and preparation before the examination day.

Some useful tips to ensure that students keep up during their school year includes

Reading Ahead of the teacher. This means that students should find out which chapter the teacher is going to teach, and then they should read the chapter ahead of the teacher.
Be Attentive and Ask Questions.
Revise Your Work -- Students should spend some time each day to revise what they have learnt in school. In this way, their memory will be retained much longer.
Finish Homework On Time -- Doing homework allows student to find out where are their weakness and at the same time it helps the students to understand better those concepts that were being taught.
Learn From Mistakes. This means that students should always clarify their mistakes in homeworks. They should find out where they went wrong and learn not to repeat the same mistakes again in the examination.

2. Learn From Mistakes
Contrary to what most students think, good students do not make fewer mistakes than poor students. In fact, they make more mistakes than anybody else! The only difference is that they make their mistakes during self-practice sessions and learn from their mistakes before the examinations. Mistakes are the best teacher. Students should learn from their mistakes in homework, assignments and class tests.

3. Take Tests And Assignments Seriously. Many students do not know the importance of tests and assignments. Tests are vital indicators of where the students stand. If students fail the test badly, then it is unlikely that they will get an "A" in the final examination. Students should do their best in each test and any assignments they may have. If students have consistently understood what they had studied, and perform well in every tests and assignment, they can be sure they can have a higher chance of scoring 'A's. As mention above, students must learn from their mistakes from tests and assignments.

The SAT is taken by more than two million students each year. SAT Test Prep is a free online training site for the SAT Test. Parents and teachers can have access to a comprehensive collection of SAT preparation material (covering all three major areas of the exam) that includes study guides, flash cards, practice questions, and even simulated exams. Quizzes, videos, blogs, wiki and interactive forums are also provided. With the launch of SAT Test School, ProProfs aims at providing students and educators the resources they need, free of charge, and in a convenient format.

Study Skills

2007-04-19T07:57:00.000+08:00

Children who have poor study skills try to memorise without understanding. They have no goals and not motivated and don't know how to plan. They have no idea about how much time an assignment should take, what is important information and what is not. They don't know how to organise themselves or their time. These are skills that are vital to success, not just in school, but in life.

Children must be taught these skills. Although some schools do make it a point to teach study techniques, parents cannot assume that children will learn the skills they need. So it's up to you to guide your child in learning the study skills that work best for them. Study skills are basic learning tools and once your child can use these tools, he will become a successful learner. No matter what you child's age is, he will need good study skills for all these stages of learning:

Stages of Learning
1. Getting information from books, lessons and presentations
Your child must be able to listen and read in order to take in information from these sources.

2. Organising information
Your child needs to use various techniques to organise information in a logical way.

3. Practising or going over the organised information
He must be able to review the information

4. Recalling and/or applying the information
Your child needs skills in test-taking and in writinug or preparing reports, such as those required for a project.

As parents, we need to explain to the children how to use study skills, show them one or two techniques and then guide them when he practises using the skills. The study skills below can help your child in the above stages of learning. If the teacher has spent a lot of time on the topic, it makes sense for our children to focus on the topic a bit more than another topic that the teacher only mentioned in passing. Besides getting information from the lessons the teacher has taught, we could also get our children to read the chapters in the school textbook in order to fill the gaps in the lessons.

Study Skills
1. In order to get the most information in a short-time, your child should check these -- chapter title, sub-headings in the chapter, pictures, graphs and captions

2. Remind your children to use active reading skills:

Jot down notes
Pick out the most important ideas and put them in his own words
Jot down questions about the chapter

3. Work out a system of taking notes

Write down the most important idea from each paragraph or small group of paragraphs. Note that the first sentence is usually the topic sentence.
Under each main heading, list important details in their own words
List further points to explain, elaborate on or make clear each sub-heading

4. Go through the notes to make sure that they are accurate and make sense to them

5. Get them to write one question that they think will be in a test (For example, write in the margin next to the section of his notes).

Memory plays a big part in learning. Most children are good at remembering certain materials and not others. Certainly, a good memory would help a child a great deal in his or her studies. A good way of helping our children to learn is through games. Learning through games is a good way of teaching that uses games as the learning tools. Not only does games provide enjoyment, it also increases kids' motivation and their thinking skills. Children have a natural inclination for ‘play’, at 123TeachMe.com, you teach your children Spanish through fun games and songs. 123TeachMe has online Spanish learning materials for grammar, vocabulary, verb conjugations, conversation, and more. The children's section includes games, songs, and vocabulary with images and audio. Besides offering Spanish for Kids, it is a site for beginners or anyone who want to learn Spanish -- There are business Spanish, conversational Spanish, Medical Spanish and even Medical Spanish Dictionary and many more. You have to visit the site to see more. Seeing is believing! It is indeed a site that is worth bookmarking. You can learn Spanish Free! Visit 123TeachMe now to start learning Spanish with your children!

Click here for Link to Spanish For Kids And Children

The True End Of Education

2007-03-20T21:51:00.001+08:00

The end of Wisdom is freedom.
The end of culture is perfection.
The end of knowledge is love.
The end of education is character.
--Sathya Sai Baba, the great contemporary world educator

Academic knowledge alone is of no great value. It may help one to earn a livelihood. But, education should go beyond the preparation for earning a living. It should prepare one for the challenges of life morally and spiritually. It is because human values are absent in "educated" persons that we find them steeped in anxiety and worry.
--Sathya Sai Baba, the great contemporary world educator

Throughout the 200-year history of public schooling, a widely scattered group of critics have pointed out that the education of young human beings should involve much more than simply molding them into future workers or citizens. Education should be understood as the art of cultivating the moral, emotional, physical, psychological and spiritual dimensions of the developing child. During the 1970s, an emerging body of literature in science, philosophy and cultural history provided an overarching concept to describe this way of understanding education -- a perspective known as holism. A holistic way of thinking seeks to encompass and integrate multiple layers of meaning and experience rather than defining human possibilities narrowly. Every child is more than a future employee; every person's intelligence and abilities are far more complex than his or her scores on standardized tests.

Holistic education is based on the premise that each person finds identity, meaning, and purpose in life through connections to the community, to the natural world, and to spiritual values such as compassion and peace. Holistic education aims to call forth from people an intrinsic reverence for life and a passionate love of learning. This is done, not through an academic "curriculum" that condenses the world into instructional packages, but through direct engagement with the environment.

Holistic education nurtures a sense of wonder. there are many paths of learning and the holistic educator values them all; what is appropriate for some children and adults, in some situations, in some historical and social contexts, may not be best for others. The art of holistic education lies in its responsiveness to the diverse learning styles and needs of evolving human beings.

Education teaches us how to live, not how to earn a living. It ought to guide and prepare a child to use to the full all the faculties that Nature has given him, Physical, mental and spiritual. Holistic education embodies the development of the spiritual, mental, and physical entities. So many people only want to be educated so that they can command a higher salary in the labour market, or that they may be a little better than their neighbours. Education for those ends will bring no happiness; at best, it will brings a sense of superiority which only causes conflict with others. Education which seeks to develop to the full the faculties of mankind brings with it countless interests and opens up innumberable avenues of adventure.

First and earliest comes physical education. Training in gymnastics and games gives a man full control of his muscles, enables him to act swiftly and neatly, and tones up all parts of his body so that it is a good servant to his brain. A well-trained body gives no trouble. The man who owns it has good health and an amount of strength and endurance which gives him power to do all the adventurous thigs he wishes to do. Explorers, mountain-climbers, sailors and athletes of all kinds owe the successes of their lives to a good physical education. And even the ordinary man, who has had the opportunity to do much in the way of pioneering, can taste the joy of life to the full when he strides out through the countryside, exulting in the sense of power which physical education gives him.

Mental education has even more treasures to offer. A man who has studied history, literature and art has access to many beauties that are a closed book to his less fortunate brethren. He has the opportunity to study the lives of great men, and to read the works and see the pictures which have been inspired by the lofties thoughts that men have had through the ages. His training in finding out the best from among all that has been done and thought in the past will enable him to obtain the greatest possible satisfaction out of all that is good and beautiful in the arts.

If his education takes a scientific turn, he has all the wonders of the universe laid out before him. Much has been discovered by science of the way in which the world works. That is wonderful enough, but there is still a great deal more to discover, and a well-educated scientist has the possibility of winning a way through to a fuller understanding of the phenomena that make up our world. Keats has written of the joy of "some watcher of the skies, when a new planet swims into his ken:. The delight of discovery must indeed be one which it would be hard to equal.

Finally, there is a spiritual education. This is hard to teach and indeed the only true teacher of it is Life itself. It teaches its pupils to see that of evil, good can be gained by those who have the will and the courage to look for it. It teaches that all the great things of the world have been found by those who were willing to face pain and hardship in the pursuit of truth. This is the most valuable of all forms of education, because it makes character. Those who look upon life as an adventure and meet all its diversites with joy, will have the best education it is possible to procure.

In 'Adults Learning', Jenny Rogers the author describes this process of experiential learning :
“All learning is best done through active involvement. Imagine that you are a non driver and that you want to learn how to drive. There are three methods open to you: to go to a lecture where a tutor tells you how to do it, to watch a skilled driver at work, or to practice in a real car with a teacher at your side. Would you have any hesitation about which method to choose? What is true for driving, a 'sensory motor skill' is equally true of every other kind of learning, whether it is cognitive or behavioural. The only effective way is to learn by doing”.

By using real-life experiences, current events, the dramatic arts and other lively sources of knowledge in place of textbook information, teachers can kindle the love of learning. By encouraging reflection and questioning rather than passive memorization of "facts," teachers keep alive the "flame of intelligence" that is so much more than abstract problem-solving skill. By accommodating differences and refusing to label children, for example, as "learning disabled" or "hyperactive," teachers bring out the unique gifts contained within each child's spirit.

Because of these facts, most schools or colleges have special internship programs or Internship Abroad for their students. It is possible to find interns all over the world and for companies worldwide to advert their internships. An internship is a short-time opportunity, usually less than a year, where the interns are able to gain experience in a career field that interests them. The work may be part or full time and occurs during the summer or the academic semester. The interns may be unpaid or receive an hourly wage, salary or stipend. The work differs widely from basic administrative activities to duties with more responsibility.

Now, it is predominantly popular culture (the media, music) and schools from which young people can learn about what it means to be human. But culture has it own agenda (not the welfare of children), and schools were not designed to replace extended families, communities, and religions. They were designed to prepare people for the world of work; to give them the skill sets that would help them up the ladder of material success.

All About Discipline

2007-03-03T20:26:00.000+08:00

Discipline is everything you put into children that influences how they turn out. Discipline is about teaching children appropriate behavior and helping them become independent and responsible people.

The first column of soldiers moved forward briskly as one man as soon as the parade commander gave the order for the march-past to begin. The massed bands had struck up a lively tune. Soon, the various contingents were swinging past the saluting dais, every man in step, columned and filed in precise straight lines. Hours of hard, disciplined work had gone into making the parade a grand success.

And it is in the same way too that life can be made successful. In fact, it is only through discipline that living becomes smooth and peaceful. Law is nothing more than community discipline. People who keep to the law accept the discipline of the state. Thus, the criminal -- the thief, murderer, gangster -- shows, by his defiance of the law, that he refuses to be disciplined.

As a child is punished when he misbehaves himself, that is, when he shows lack of discipline -- so also is a criminal shown, by punishment or some penal treatment, that he has to conform to the discipline of the state. As a child is shown kindness as well as firmness when being taught discipline, so also should a wrong-doer be treated understandingly as well as strictly, so that he may not become hardened in crime.

The image of the education of a child is specially appropriate in illustrating the need for and power of discipline. From birth, a child is taught discipline. Its feeding and sleeping are regulated, otherwise the child will grow up unhealthy. Bowel-training is important, otherwise there will be frequent stomach upsets, with their consequent ill-effects on the growing body. As the child grows, it is taught respectful and unselfish behaviour, or it will turn into a young savage. Discipline features in every stage of the child's development, whether mental or physical.

The word "discipline" is associated most frequently with school life. Discipline is defined as instruction: training and mode of life in accordance with rules, subjection to control. It has the same origin as the word "disciple", meaning "pupil, follower". It is in school, especially, that discipline is taught with reference to all aspects of the definition given. A schoolboy is given instruction in various subjects; he is trained and shown a mode of reasonable existence which will fit him for adult life; and, to his repeated annoyance, he is subject to constant control.

"Discipline" must be distinguish from "order" with which it is frequently confused. Order is the condition which results from discipline. But order may be imposed from without. Discipline, finally comes from within. True discipline is always self-discipline. The aim of all schooling is to teach children to to discipline themselves; to guarantee that order will result from a child's recognition of the fact that order is utterly necessary. Discipline certainly cannot be based on mere fear of authority. For, as a child approaches adulthood, it is moving more and more away from the figures of authority. A person becomes more and more independent as he grows up. With this growing sense of independence, he must also grow a sense of discipline and respect for the rights of others.

A disciplined child, growing into a disciplined youth or adolescent, will finally emerge into society as a disciplined adult -- one who is ready to play a constructive role in his community. Life will have its trials and disappointments; it is discipline which will enable a person to remain cool and sensible amidst the stresses of life. When temptation to evil occurs, it is discipline which will help overcome it. Should a person fall, it is discipline which will set him on his feet again. All this is trite and what "enlightened" people would call "moral". It is a fact, however, which cannot be denied.

There were some misguided psychologists who said that a child should be left to develop on its won, that he should be allowed to do anything he willed -- free discipline should be encouraged. The woeful effects of "free" discipline show that the child becomes neither "free" to develop healthily, nor "disciplined". And other psychologist have come up to say that a child wants discipline. In its uncertainty, a child craves guidance. And that is what discipline eventually gives him, so that, growing up, he may be able to see his way about the mazes of life.

Kids encountered problems both in terms of health and learning. Parents are always concerned for the welfare of their children. They want their children to have the best of everything and they want to raise children who will eventually turn to good adults. Where parenting is concerned, they read up materials on parenting, attend parenting seminars and attend various talks organized by the schools so as to build a better parents-teachers relationships so as to help to nurture better students. Having problems with your kids? Does your kid have poor motivation, ADHD, apathy etc? Youth Change is resourceful site offering solutions for the 'worst' kids problems : K-12 education especially focusing on special ed, problem students, emotionally disturbed students, teacher training, teacher workshops and inservice as well. It is your one stop guide for everything you need to solve your children's problems. Seek help, find books, posters and more at Youth Change, a site for teachers, youth professionals, parents, care-givers and other non-youth workers.

Kids And Examination

2007-01-24T10:10:00.000+08:00

Examinations of all kinds are a traditional part of educational policy in the world. From the age of twelve, children from the Primary right up to Secondary and Tertiary Education have to take examinations.

Examinations are often denounced as a bad system. But they have their uses. In schools, colleges and government departments, examinations are necessary as tests of efficiency. There must be some visible proof that a boy is fit to be promoted to a higher class, the next stage in his education; and there must be some tangible guarantee that a young man leaving college has imbibed a certain amount of knowledge and undergone a certain amount of mental training.

Before anyone can be given a responsible post, he must have a chance of showing that he has sufficient intelligence and knowledge to be safely entrusted with the duties of the position. Such a test entrusted with the duties of the position. Such a test is of special importance in such practical professions as medicine; for no one will want to entrust his health to a man who has not proved that he has sound knowledge of the human body, the laws of health, and the remedies for disease. In all these cases, the only practical test seems to be the examination.

Examinations are also useful as a stimulus to work. If a student at college knows there is no examination ahead of him, unless he has the love of acquiring knowledge for its own sake, he will take things easily, and not put in the amount of hard work and systematic study necessary to a sound education.

On the other hand, there are no doubt evils connected with the examination system. For one thing, examinations encourage the habit of cramming. It is quite possible to pass an examination by cramming; but that means that an examination may not be a real test of knowledge. For knowledge acquired by cramming is superficial and easily forgotten, and has no effect in training the intellectual powers.

For this reason, an examination is not an unfailing test of efficiency: for the man who passes may not really be as good as the man who fails, who may have a better brain and sounder knowledge. And an examination is no test of moral qualities, which are the most important of all.

Great Care is always given by educational establishments to the preparation for examinations. This required the use of suitable textbooks is always covered and "mock" examination and revision are extensively given. The quality of the teaching is generally high. This is important, because all learning, particularly for examinations is two way combination of the efforts of both the teacher and the pupil. The pupil must, of course, do the necessary work and committing to memory and if he had done so, then he should be able to pass the examination for which he and his teacher have been working.

Walch Publishing is an independent, family-owned publisher of educational supplemental materials for grades 3 through 12 and adult markets. Located in Portland, Maine, they send products to customers throughout the United States and Canada as well as to many other countries around the world. Dedicated to education, Walch Publishing is dedicated to helping teachers to help all students achieve their full potentials. They provide a wide selection of supplemental materials for students.

For at risk students, the ELA ASP (Academic Support Program) is a complete modular package for improving academic performance. By integrating instructional strategies with test practice, it is a powerful solution for the great majority of striving students who aren't served by test practice alone, while being flexible enough to "back up" as different kids need it, and has been designed around the IRA/NCTE standards.

At Walch Publishing, their target audience are teachers, administrators, and curriculum directors in school districts that have a number of at-risk students. A state-specific version of the ASP has already been developed for Massachusetts, developed in partnership with Bostom Public Schools, and they are eager to work with districts in other states as well.

Training Your Child

2006-11-29T18:44:00.000+08:00

Every child is unique. As a parent, you need to be flexible and adjust according to your child's personality. You should not try to love and handle your children as equally as possible. This will be difficult as children need to be loved and treated uniquely. For example, a child will always compare and want the same things as his sibling. If he is given a pair of new sports shoes because he is taking part in a sports event, this does not mean that you must also buy a pair for the sibling who is not taking part. Your child needs to be taught that the cannot always seek equality but should seek what is fair. You should also teach your children that life is not always fair.

An important part of being a parent is training your child to be useful. Quite often, parents are so busy that they focus mainly on helping their children in their studies and telling them what is right or wrong. Your children can be taught responsiblity by being given responsiblity.

The best time to start is when he is about two to three years of age.

Dressing Up: As soon as he is able to put on clothes(Customink.com is a custom apparel company servicing schools, small business, sports teams and events.), let him do it. The result will be jumperss back-to-front and ludicrously unsuitable combinations of clothes. His pride in the achievement is far more valuable than your pride in his neatness and tidiness. Instead, we should congratulate him and sometime later, try to correct his wilder flights of fancy.

Tidy Children's Room: Children are capable of tidying their rooms from about three onwards, but they need help -- otherwise they become discouraged, or distracted by toys. Turn tidying-up into a game, but allow them a room or a corner where their mess is tidied up only once a day. Constant clearing away of toys, hats, books, shoes, and so on also clears away their fantasies, their imagination and, consequently, their learning capability.

These are two examples of tasks your child is capable of doing from young. He is capable of putting toys away and he can progress to greater responsiblities such as keeping his toys away evertytime he finishes playing, and keeping the toys neatly.

By the time the child is in primary school, he can be responsible for putting his cups and plates away. If your child is not having any responsibility, start with some of these. For my children, I always have them to help out in hanging their own socks and handkerchiefs, folding the household clothes and towels, sweeping the floor and wiping the dining table.

Training your child to be responsible needs to start with what he can do at home. If he cannot do this, it is very difficult to get him to be responsible for his homework. He needs to see that responsiblity starts with the things that he needs and uses. Otherwise, he would not see any reason for doing homework whihc he does not need or care.

Families with maids sometimes face the difficulty of getting the child to do things. Therefore, the maid needs to be told not to do such things for the child. There are also some parents of older children who do everything for the child like preparing breakfast, washing his shoes and so on because they want the child go spend more time on studies than on housework. This is common if the child is a boy because it is sometimes felt that boys should not be troubled to do housework.

It is a good idea for parents to teach their children at an early age that all family members must work together to make the household run, and that each person must do his or her share of the work load. This can be done by beginning a program of chores and responsibilities when children are young.

Chores are beneficial for children - even very young ones. Being responsible for doing chores teaches children many important skills such as cooperation and responsibility. Chores also teach children about fairness and commitment. The skills and values learned by doing chores will benefit children throughout their lives.

Learning English

2006-11-23T12:17:00.000+08:00

The English language belongs to the western sub-branch of the Germanic branch, which is itself a branch of the Indo-European family of languages.

English Language, primary language of the majority of people in the United Kingdom, the United States, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, other former colonies of Britain, and territories of the United States. It is also an official or semiofficial language of many countries with a colonial past, such as India, Nigeria, Pakistan, and South Africa. Even in countries where English is not a primary or official language, it is taught as a foreign language and used as the language of technology and diplomacy. English is spoken in more parts of the world than any other language and by more people than any other language except Chinese.

Facts About English

English is the most widespread language in the world and is more widely spoken and written than any other language.

Over 400 million people use the English vocabulary as a mother tongue, only surpassed in numbers, but not in distribution by speakers of the many varieties of Chinese.

Over 700 million people, speak English, as a foreign language.

Of all the world's languages (over 2,700) English is arguably the richest in vocabulary; and that the Oxford English Dictionary lists about 500,000 words, and a further half-million technical and scientific terms remain uncatalogued.

Three-quarters of the world's mail, telexes and cables are in English.

The main language used throughout the world on the internet is English.

More than half of the world's technical and scientific periodicals are in English.

English is the medium for 80% of the information stored in the world's computers.

English is the language of navigation, aviation and of Christianity; it is the ecumenical language of the World Council of Churches.

5 of the largest broadcasting companies in the world (CBS, NBC, ABC, BBC and CBC) transmit in English, reaching millions and millions of people all over the world.

Speaking and reading English well is essential for success in America.

Under No Child Left Behind, the academic progress of every child will be tested in reading and math, including those learning English. All English language learners will be tested annually to measure how well they are learning English, so their parents will know how they are progressing. States and schools will be held accountable for results.

Research shows that students who can't read or write in English have a greater likelihood of dropping out of school, and they often face a lifetime of diminished opportunity.

Language, written and spoken is very important and should be taught to children starting at a very early age. Parents are the primary educators of children's speech

How to teach the English language:

Language concepts:

* Help children understand that speech can come in the form of writing.
* Develop children's understanding that writing is a message in the form of print and that print is constant.
* Show that written language is often different from spoken language.
* Teach that numbers, letters and words are different.
* Show the difference between a letter, a word and a sentence.
* Help children understand that a letter or letters represent a sound within a word.
* Show them that words form sentences and sentences form messages or stories.

Spoken and written text understandings:

* Always write a sentence or sentences under children's drawings.
* Encourage children to write their own sentences and name.
* Provide writing areas like a white board, a chalk board or scribbling posters hanging on the wall.
* Use pictures often to explain and express situations.
* Encourage children to draw pictures and simple diagrams about key events.
* Stay on the topic when speaking and keep children focused.
* Provide hypothetical situations to predict, generalize, imagine and discuss situations.

Word Awareness:

* Introduce word games and play oral word games.
* Draw children's attention to patterns in words and sentences.
* Provide ample opportunity to extend children's knowledge of word meanings.
* Expose children to a wide range of vocabulary.
* Make children aware of gender and collective nouns, synonyms, antonyms, homophones and contractions.
* Show suffixes, prefixes and word parts.

Though apparently simple, English is in fact subtle and complex, containing pitfalls for those who haven't grown up with it. Some nationalities find great difficulties in grasping the language and its pronunciation. To learn English there are many online resources available nowadays. Anyone can learn English at home in front of their computer.

Children's Education Funding

2006-11-22T20:50:00.000+08:00

Two Children From Torrey Family By Anonymous

College costs are on the rise – how will you finance your child’s college education 5, 10, or 20 years from now?

Planning for a child's education isn't as simple as it used to be. With the costs of a college education rising every year, the keys to funding your child's education are to plan early and invest shrewdly. Today's options offer more potential, but must be chosen carefully. Depending on family income and other factors, it's important to make these decisions as early in the child's life as possible.

The cost of private school and college tuition and expenses can burden even the most affluent of families. The best way to help meet these costs is to create a college funding strategy and choose the option that best suits your family. Remember the need to insure your ability to help pay your child's college expenses. Your ability to provide financial support is important. Should you die, life insurance can help replace the loss of your income and fulfill your dream for your children's future.

Here are 5 ways to fund your child's college education.

1. From savings. This means that the parents have extra savings in their bank account to provide for the children educational funds.

2. Your child can work his or her way through college. This means that the students have to work and study at the same time.

3. Your child may obtain a scholarship or be entitled to grants from either federal or local funds towards the cost of their college education.

4. Take out an education savings plan to fund college education. This is normally provided by insurance company and the plan can start as soon as the baby is born.

It is never too soon to begin planning and saving for a child’s education. You can start when the child is born by segregating gifts of cash and securities in a separate account to defray tuition costs later. Education planning should not stop once the child starts college, as tax savings opportunities continue to exist while the child is in college and even after college.

5. Your child may have the opportunity to take out student loans to fund their college education.

Today the vast majority of students are forced to take out student loans to fund all or part of their college education. Usually to subsidize parental contributions, student loans are the most common way of students funding their own college education. Many students however, leave college with substantial debt and even with interest rates at historically low levels today's students can expect to have to pay substantial monthly repayments for many years.

There are a number of options to fund your child's college education but the only way funds can be guaranteed is by you taking out an education savings plan. With the education savings plan you decide what you can invest and your child can also contribute to his or her college education. With luck scholarships and grants will still be available as will loans to top up if necessary. If your child does not go to college the fund can be cashed in.

Taking out an education savings plan early will give your child the real opportunity of a college education and the best prospects for a job when they leave college.

Attention all international students who do not qualify for federal student aid or qualify for enough, students who need extra money for books, fees, tuition, living, food, housing etc while in college: Seek advantages of private student loans from NextStudent. Unlike federal student loans, the check is sent directly to students, not to the school.

Concepts Of Montessori

2006-11-21T13:12:00.000+08:00

he Montessori method is both a methodology and educational philosophy. It was originally developed in the early 1900s by Dr. Maria Montessori as a way to educate poor children in her native Italy. Many Montessori schools are preschool or elementary school in level, but there are some Montessori programs which have all grade levels up to and including High School.

The Montessori method emphasizes the uniqueness of each child and recognizes that children are different from adults in the way they develop and think (they aren't just "adults in small bodies"). Dr. Montessori believed in children's rights, the value and importance of children's work to develop themselves into adults, and that this development would lead to world peace.

The Montessori method discourages traditional measurements of achievement (grades, tests) as negative competition that is damaging to the inner growth of children (and adults). Feedback and qualitative analysis of a child's performance does exist but is generally provided in the form of a list of skills, activities and critical points, and sometimes a narrative of the child's achievements, strengths and weaknesses. Deficiencies in one area are treated as places to improve, not as failures.

The Montessori method is based on observing young children and learning from them about their characteristics and needs. Universal characteristics of children are recognized for each level of development: the first is birth through 6, the second is ages 6-12. Montessori classroom for the first level is called the casa dei bambini, or "children's house," where each child is nurtured and guided in individually-paced learning and development. As children enter the second level, they become peer-oriented and learn best in a social environment, collaborating with others, and "cosmic education" is introduced to expand their awareness and develop as citizens of the community and the world.

As an educational approach, the Montessori method's focus is on the individuality of each child in respect of their needs or talents, as opposed to the needs of the class as a whole. A goal is to help the child maintain their natural joy of learning.

The Montessori method encourages a great deal of independence, freedom within appropriate limits, which is always linked with responsibility. The youngest children are guided in "practical life" skills towards taking care of themselves, maintaining their environment, and interacting gracefully with others. Integral to the practical life activities are essential skills such as focusing of attention, hand-eye-body coordination, and the students' ability to accomplish what they set out to do.

The Montessori Method states that satisfaction, contentment, and joy result from the child having access and guidance to be full participants in daily activities. There are also attractive and enticing materials with which the child gains a foundation for academics and other skills. Montessori education carried through the elementary and high school years follows the child's emerging tendency for peer interactions and still emphasize each student as guardian of his or her own intellectual development.

Premises
The premises of a Montessori approach to teaching and learning include the following:

A view of children as competent beings capable of self-directed learning.

That children learn in a distinctly different way from adults.

The ultimate importance of observation of the child interacting with his environment as the basis for ongoing curriculum development. Presentation of subsequent exercises for skill development and information accumulation are based on the teacher's observation that the child has mastered the current exercise(s).

Delineation of sensitive periods of development, during which a child's mind is particularly open to learning specific skills or knowledge, including language development, sensorial experimentation and refinement, and various levels of social interaction.

A belief in the "absorbent mind", that children from birth to around age 6 possess limitless motivation to achieve competence within their environment and to perfect skills and understandings. This phenomenon is characterized by the young child's capacity for repetition of activities within sensitive period categories, such as exhaustive babbling as language practice leading to language competence.

That children are masters of their environment, which has been specifically prepared for them to be academic, comfortable, and allow a maximum amount of independence.

That children learn through discovery, so didactic materials that are self-correcting are used as much as possible.

Independent problem solving is encouraged.

Goals
The goal of Montessori is to provide a stimulating, child-centered environment in which children can explore, touch, and learn without fear, thus engendering a lifelong love of learning as well as providing the child the self-control necessary to fulfill that love.

Criticisms
A wide range of conflicting criticisms have been leveled at the Montessori method. Some parents believe the Montessori environment leaves the children too free while others see the Montessori method as stifling to creativity. Some see Montessori schools as elitist prep schools for preschoolers while others question Montessori teaching priorities, and decry children spending time on such menial tasks as washing tables or arranging flowers. Some parents are put off by what they view to be Montessori teachers' unusual manners: some may appear too subdued, others too stern, none of them necessarily praising or teaching the children in a conventional manner.

The two primary critics of the Montessori Method in education theory are William Heard Kilpatrick and John Dewey. They thought that Montessori was too restrictive, and didn't adequately emphasize social interaction and development. Dewey believed that the Montessori Method stifled creativity.

Another criticism of Montessori schools is that they do not traditionally assign homework. The lessons taught in a Montessori classroom are not generally conducive to home use, and the materials are highly specialized. It would be unlikely that a parent would buy materials for this purpose. Critics allege that a child who transfers to a traditional school and is required to do homework will have trouble adjusting, although research has shown the opposite. Homework in some form has started to find its way into the Montessori curriculum, if in a somewhat forced manner.

For many years Montessori schools in North America did not believe in marking students according to letter grade system, and instead issued report cards that focused entirely on descriptions of the student's behavior and progress in class. Many parents complained that such report cards made it too difficult to get a clear picture on how well or poorly a student was doing in their subjects. As a result, some American Montessori schools now issue letter grades just as non-Montessori classes do.

Within the Montessori professional community, there have been squabbles ranging from minutiae to the core principles of the philosophy. Those from one training background may believe another is too strict or outdated while others are accused of diluting Montessori's scientifically derived vision of ideal environments to support human development.

Montessori Education

2006-11-20T13:12:00.000+08:00

Landscape With Children By A Brook By Francis Danby

"Scientific observation has established that education is not what the teacher gives; education is a natural process spontaneously carried out by the human individual, and is acquired not by listening to words but by experiences upon the environment. The task of the teacher becomes that of preparing a series of motives of cultural activity, spread over a specially prepared environment, and then refraining from obtrusive interference. Human teachers can only help the great work that is being done, as servants help the master. Doing so, they will be witnesses to the unfolding of the human soul and to the rising of a New Man who will not be a victim of events, but will have the clarity of vision to direct and shape the future of human society." ~ Maria Montessori, Education for a New World

Montessori is a nurturing process of educating children. Dr. Maria Montessori believed that a child learns best within a social environment that encourages individuality.

The child in a Montessori class is allowed to develop at their own pace intellectually. What is made available to the child are the keys and a road map to the exploration of the world. The child is shown a basic concept and is guided to build on that idea. Arranging groups of objects from left to right, top to bottom, large to small, concrete to abstract, forms a pattern that children carry over naturally to reading, writing, and calculating. These are not haphazard events; each skill is developed to interlock with another. The child learns each segment at their own pace, and moves on to the next as each one is mastered.

Montessori is a highly hands-on approach to learning. It encourages children to develop their observation skills by doing many types of activities. These activities include use of the five senses, kinetic movement, spatial refinement, small and large motor skill coordination, and concrete knowledge that leads to later abstraction.

The classroom
A Montessori classroom is quiet, bright, clean, well-maintained and attractive. Nothing should be torn, broken, dirty, or otherwise unattractive. Furniture is child-sized, and there is no teachers' desk. The typical classroom consists of four areas: Practical Life, Sensorial, Language, and Mathematics. Practical life includes activities such as buttoning, sweeping, pouring, slicing, tying, etc. Sensorial includes activities to stimulate and train hearing, touch, smell, and taste.

Most Montessori classrooms try to include ways for the children to interact with the natural world, perhaps through a classroom pet (rabbits, gerbils, mice, etc.), or a small garden where the children can plant vegetables or flowers.

In schools that extend to the upper grades, each Montessori classroom still includes an approximately three-year age range in order to establish a non-competitive atmosphere in the classroom. This system allows for children to review work as many times as necessary and to move rapidly through the materials as they are able, as well as allowing children to become natural teachers by sharing what they have learned. The children realize that class work is different for each person and are less likely to try to keep track of where other children are academically.

Pedagogical materials
Every activity has its place in the classroom and is self-contained and self-correcting. The original didactic materials are specific in design, conforming to exact dimensions, and each activity is designed to focus on a single skill, concept or exercise. All of the material is based on SI units of measurement (for instance, the Pink Tower is based on the 1cm cube) which allows all the materials to work together and complement each other, as well as introduce the SI units through concrete example. In addition to this, material is intended for multiple uses at the primary level. A perfect example of this is the "Knobbed Cylinder" materials: not only do they directly offer a sensorial lesson, but indirectly the child's grip on the cylinders paves the way for holding a pencil, and the grades of cylinders allow for an introduction to mathematics.

Other materials are often constructed by the teacher: felt storyboard characters, letter boxes (small containers of objects that all start with the same letter) for the language area, science materials (e.g. dinosaurs for tracing, etc.), scent or taste activities, and so on. The practical life area materials are almost always put together by the teacher. All activities, however, must be neat, clean, attractive and preferably made of natural materials such as glass or wood, rather than plastic. Sponges, brooms and dustpans are provided and any mishaps (including broken glassware) are not punished but rather treated simply as an opportunity for the children to demonstrate responsibility by cleaning up after themselves.

At higher grade levels, the teacher becomes more involved in creating materials since not only the students but also the potential subject matter widens so much. However, many of the earlier materials can be revisited with a new explanation, emphasis or use; for example, the cube that a five-year-old used as an exercise in color matching is revealed to the junior-high level student to physically embody the mathematical relationship (a+b)3=a3 + 3a2b + 3ab2 +b3.

Lessons
A child may not work with an activity until the teacher has demonstrated its proper use to him or her, and then he or she may use it as he or she wishes (limited only by his or her imagination or a danger to the material, himself or herself or others) Each activity leads directly to a new level of learning or concept. When a child "plays," he or she is acquiring the basis for later concepts. Repetition of activities is considered an integral part of this learning process and children are allowed to repeat activities as often as they wish. A child becoming tired of the repetition is thought to be a sign they are ready for the next level of learning.

The child proceeds at his or her own pace from concrete objects and tactile experiences to abstract thinking, writing, reading, science, mathematics. For example, in the language area, the child begins with the sandpaper letters (26 flat wooden panels, each with a single letter of the alphabet cut from sandpaper and affixed to it). The child's first lesson is to trace the shape of the letter with their fingers while saying the phonic sound of the letter. A next level activity might be the letter boxes (small containers each with a letter on the top, filled with objects that begin with that letter). Having mastered these, the child may move on to the word boxes (small containers each with a short three-letter word on the top, for example CAT, containing a small wooden cat and the letters C, A, T). One child might move through all three levels of lessons in a few weeks while another might take several months; although there is a prescribed sequence of activities there is no prescribed timetable. A Montessori teacher or instructor observes each child like a scientist, providing him with appropriate lessons as he is ready for them.

Home schoolers may find both the philosophy and the materials useful since each child is treated as an individual and activities are self-contained, self-correcting, and expandable. Aspects of the Montessori Method can easily scale down to a homeschooling environment - save, of course, Montessori's requirement for large, mixed age groups of children.

Reading With Children

2006-11-19T15:30:00.000+08:00

Reading is very important. It is not only important to children, it is important for every individual on earth. Reading helps one to become an informed citizen, to succeed in one's chosen career, and to have a better personal fulfillment.

Reading aloud is a time-honored tradition between parents and children, especially in their formative years. This will have lifelong impact on the child's learning experiences, developmental progress, and even social interaction skills later in life. For example, even during infancy children are able to pick up on things as complex and subtle as the intonation in their parents' voices.

Reading to your child is also a great way for a parent and child to spend time together, especially at the end of a hectic day.

Children who read well do better in other subjects and in all aspects of schooling and beyond. Children who read frequently have more knowledge, they can write better and they have a better vocabulary than a child who don't read at all. As the world becomes more complex, reading is increasingly important for children trying to find their place in it.

When to start
Like always, as early as possible! Six or seven month babies like to watch pictures and colours. You could start with hardbound or cloth books to introduce the concept of books, turning pages and handling the book in general.

The market is flooded with books for all age groups today. You can even find online stories available at some websites! As soon as your child sits in one place for five minutes you could introduce storytelling. Start with short stories with colourful pictures and then move on as your child starts to enjoy the storytelling sessions.

Even though she may not understand the story or poem, reading together gives your child a chance to learn about language, enjoy the sound of your voice, and be close to you. Be vary of people, including grand parents, who would repeatedly warn you that its too soon to introduce books to the 'baby'. Insist this is the right age and soon your child will prove you right!

Make it interactive
Try and set aside a fixed time of the day when you can give your full attention to reading with your child. Start by choosing a cosy and comfortable spot and a favourite book. Clear all distractions, like music, television etc.

Read slowly so that your child can form a mental picture of what is happening in the story,

Which books to choose
Though this may vary from child to child choose short stories with lots of pictures. Stories that are too long or have too many characters might confuse the child. If your child is scared of ghosts, monsters etc avoid stories involving them. For preschoolers, try to pick stories with clear-cut endings. While it's important to avoid titles that are completely over your child's head, encourage your child to pick slightly more advanced books for his age. Experts also add that parents must choose books they enjoy.

After you read
Talking about books you read is just as important as reading them. Discussing a story or a book with your child helps your child understand it and connect it to his or her own experience of life.

One great way to improve your child's reading comprehension is to ask questions about the story later on. Having your child exercise problem-solving skills, draw conclusions, and form opinions prepares them for the real world in many ways! Go somewhere inspired by your books. This helps bring your child's stories to life. If you've just read a book about the zoo or market place visit one so that the child can relate to the story in a better way.

Make sure you have fun
Though there are techniques and methods to read to your child, make sure that you do not stick to the rules at the cost of enjoyment for the child.

Tips to encourage your child to read

Set a good example. Let your child see you reading as often as possible; there's no better way to convey a love of books.

Have 'library time' at home, where in all the members of the house sit in one room with a book in hand for 5-15 minutes everday depending on the liking and time available.

Encourage relatives and friends to give your child books as gifts.

Take your child to the books library regularly and if possible have an independent library for him/her, where she gets to pick the books of his/her liking.

Surround the child with books. Make sure you don't buy expensive books, or else they will find their way to cupboard under lock and key. Instead pick some from the local raddiwallah and let them handle the books independently. Hardbound or plastic coated books are also a good option.

Do you read books to your children? Magazines Direct is a place for family. There are many categories of Magazines. For example, there are children magazines, Fashion Magazines and Car Magazines. Magazines Direct offers subscriptions to over 1,300 magazines at the lowest prices allowed by the publishers for general internet sales. Satisfaction is 100% guaranteed. Want to send a magazine subscription as a gift? We'll mail the recipient a free gift card customized with the message you would.

Other Useful Links

Forever Kids

2006-11-16T13:22:00.000+08:00

Whether you are a parent now or you are still single, or you are married without kids, in the eyes of your parents, you are always their kid and a kid to them. No matter you are in your 30s or in your 50s, and your parents are in the 70s or 90s, you are always a kid in your parents eyes. Your parents will always love you and treat you like a kid. And you, as a 'kid' knows where to seek 'love shelter' when you are lonely and needs someone to talk to and seek comfort. Your parents are always there for you whenever you need their help.

As parents, we also want our children to have the best of everything and we want our children to enjoy their life. Life is full of stress and so many times, family members are so obsessed with their own work and studies as well. It is during special occasion and special holidays where we can find excuse to take a break from all these busy schedule!

Within a year, there are hardly many occasion or holidays which you can celebrate. Some of which could be Christmas (but that would only be celebrated by Christian), Hari Raya (celebrated only for Muslims), and Chinese New Year (celebrated by Chinese). What about common occasion where we can celebrate? To name a few, Wedding anniversaries, Birthdays and National Day are something in common where people can take time off to have some fun and spent time with the family and children.

Whether you are celebrating your own wedding anniversaries, or whether you are celebrating your children's birthdays or birthdays for any members of the family, or even celebrating a wedding for your grown-up 'kid', we need to have a program organizer. We need someone like a DJ to entainment the guest and to amuse the guest. And the we, the host, can have a peace of mind, to enjoy ourselves and to socialize with our guests at such a rare meeting. Of course, if you don't intend to make the celebration a grand one, a DJ is unnecessary at all. A grand celebration like wedding would require you to hire a DJ.

Depending on your requirements, the job of the DJ is to assist you in your celebration of any kind, ensuring a smooth operation and everyone got the best of entertainment. There would be music played to add on to the special occasion.

I think it would be a great idea to have a grand celebration for our 'kids' on his/her 21st birthday. We want to spent every single minute of our time with our children and we want them to know that they are being loved. On this day, they have reached adulthood and we want to spend the very last day of 'childhood' with them.

In order to really have a fun time and have a peace of mind, I would like to book for a DJ or a program organizer. On this day, I do not want to worry about entertaining the guest with music or things like that. I want to be in the crowd, enjoying too. I would rather have the DJ to look after these for me. There is always 'a kid in everyone of us'. On this special day, won't it be nice, to have fun and to feel young again?

Childhood memories is just so precious for us. We know that time can never be reversed. We can only cherish our memories and to share them with our kids. As we know the importance of childhood memories, we also want our children to have the best childhood memories, a unforgettable memory of childhood spent with the family. So, whether you want to celebrate your 'kid's' 21st birthday or celebrate your 'kid's' wedding, have a grand and unforgettable one, it's just once in a life time. Once it is over, you can never have it again.
And remember, we are forever kids. We are God's kids!

Happy Children

2006-11-15T14:32:00.000+08:00

The Sea Horse By Frederick Morgan

What Does it Take to Raise Happy Children?
By Dr. Jim Taylor

One of the most frequent comments I get from parents is “I just want my kid to be happy.” Though an admirable and common objective, happiness is one of the most neglected family values in twenty-first-century America. Few parents grasp the essential meaning of happiness for their children and fewer still understand how they can help their children to find it.

Parents’ efforts at helping their children gain happiness are undermined by the distorted messages that popular culture communicates to parents about happiness; that happiness can be found in wealth, celebrity, power, and physical attractiveness. Yet research and anecdotal accounts of people who have these attributes show that pursuit of these “false idols” can actually cause unhappiness.

By understanding how happiness develops, you can help your children find true happiness. The real causes of happiness are all within your children’s control so they can actively do things that foster their own happiness.

Self-Esteem
Self-esteem is a powerful contributor to happiness. Self-esteem gives children a sense of security from which they can engage the world, which enables them to approach life with confidence. Self-esteem also offers children a strong sense of competence, in which they view themselves as able people who can master important aspects of their lives. This faith in their abilities facilitates success, which can cultivate happiness. It also reduces worry and anxiety, which can cause unhappiness.

Positive Attitude
We’ve all seen children who just have a great attitude about things. They’re positive, optimistic, and hopeful. They see a world filled with sunlight and warmth rather than clouds and cold. These children tend to be happy because they see the “glass half-full,” meaning they expect good things to happen to them. Children with positive attitudes are also more likely to express gratitude. Children who appreciate the opportunities they’re given and convey genuine gratitude to those who help them have been found to be happy people.

Passion
Another essential contributor to your children’s happiness is a passion for something in their lives, be it writing, soccer, or another avenue. Passionate children are happy children because there is something in their lives that they absolutely love to do. Children’s passions engage, absorb, and thrill them. For example, the reader who savors every word of the books she reads or the cellist who listens to Yo Yo Ma for hours on end. Just being involved in any way in the activities for which they have a passion makes them happy.

Popular culture doesn’t want your children to be passionate about their lives. It wants your children to connect to things that make it more money, for example, a passion for video games and shopping. In a short time, children get bored with their purchases and need to buy more stuff in the misguided belief they will feel passion for them. Parents exacerbate this dependence by choosing the expedient route for entertaining their children—handing them over to popular culture—rather than finding activities that engage their children, from which they might find a passion.

Balance
The unhappiest children I work with are those who lead unbalanced lives. They spend most of their time in one activity and their self-esteem is based on how they do in that activity. The problem with devotion to one activity is that things will not always go well, there will be times when children have setbacks and failures, and they will experience boredom, disenchantment, and frustration. If the one activity is all that your children have to feel good about themselves, you are at risk for unhappiness.

Popular culture wants your children to be imbalanced. Children see young stars, like the soccer player, Freddie Abdu, or the actress, Hilary Duff are told by popular culture that they must sacrifice balance and, for example, join “all-star” traveling sports teams or take piano or dance classes five days a week to become superstars. Children who are out of balance are at risk of falling over—metaphorically—and being very unhappy.

Balanced children derive happiness from many outlets, for example, sports, involvement in spiritual or cultural activities, or reading. Children who have balance in their lives will still have experiences where things don’t go well, but, because their self-esteem is not based solely on one activity and other parts of their lives bring them happiness, they’re still able to maintain their happiness.

Be a Human Being
Popular culture doesn’t want to raise human beings. Instead, it wants to create “human consumings” whose primary purpose in life is to spend and devour. Human consumings buy, buy, and buy in the mistaken belief that it will bring them happiness. You can observe ravenous young human consumings every day in the malls, buying clothes and shoes “they absolutely must have!”

Happy children are human beings, not human consumings. Being involves children finding happiness not in things, but in experiences, relationships, and activities that offer meaning, satisfaction, and joy. The ability to just be grounds happy children in who they are rather than what they own, and gives them control over what brings them happiness.

Relationships
One of the most robust findings in the research on happiness is that people who have strong relationships tend to be the happiest people. The opportunity to give and receive love, friendship, and support from family, friends, schoolmates, and others is essential to happiness. Positive feedback from others—love, respect, encouragement—is the most readily available source of happiness. Social relationships may also reduce stress, increase feelings of security, and generate other positive emotions, all of which are conducive to happiness.

Popular culture doesn’t want your children to have healthy relationships. It preys on isolated and lonely children who are desperate for any kind of connection with others. Children who have good relationships have less of a need for attention, stimulation, and acceptance. They’re less vulnerable to appeals from popular culture that may make them feel important or popular.

Giving to Others
We often look for happiness in the wrong places. We’re preoccupied with looking inside ourselves to find happiness with psychotherapy, meditation, and self-help books to uncover our internal obstacles to happiness. Or people look for happiness outside of themselves in the form of consumerism, drug and alcohol use, and other forms of gratification. But happiness can’t be found down either of those roads.

Your children will ultimately find happiness outside of themselves, by giving of themselves to others. There is something profoundly nourishing about putting others’ needs ahead of our own and helping others find happiness. Giving to others somehow touches us in a very deep way and provides a feeling of meaning, satisfaction, and joy that can’t be found elsewhere. In putting their own needs aside to help others, children’s own deepest needs are met.

About the Author:
Jim Taylor, PhD, is the author of eight books including his latest, Your Children are Under Attack: How Popular Culture is Destroying Your Kids’ Values, and How You Can Protect Them (Sourcebooks, March 2005), from which this article is adopted, and Positive Pushing: How to Raise a Successful and Happy Child (Hyperion, 2003). He has worked with young people, parents, and educators for 20 years. He has been a consultant and frequent speaker to numerous elementary and secondary schools, youth-sports programs, and performing-arts organizations around the country. Dr. Taylor has appeared on NBC’s Today Show, Fox New Channel’s Fox & Friends, UPN’s Life & Style, ABC's World News This Weekend, and major television network affiliates, and has participated in many radio shows and national print publications. Sign up for Dr. Taylor's free quarterly newsletter, Kids & Culture Alert at www.drjimtaylor.com.

Perfect Parenting Tips

2006-07-17T14:31:00.000+08:00

Every child is different, and every parent is different. Perfect parenting is parenting with a plan. It is based on action, rather than reaction. Knowledge, rather than chance. Thoughtfulness, rather than anger. Common sense, rather than nonsense. Just as labeling one the "perfect marriage" doesn't mean that both partners are perfect human beings, Perfect Parenting doesn't imply that a parent can, or should even strive to, be "perfect." Perfect Parenting is a process whereby parents, in all their human flaws and weaknesses, do their personal best to raise capable, responsible, happy children.

The Perfect Parenting Keys:
Key #1: Take charge. If your child doesn't clearly understand that YOU are the boss, even minor issues can cause you major headaches. Your first response to this statement may be, "Oh, but my children know who's the boss in our house." You may think they do, but there are many ways we give mixed messages and confuse our kids over this issue. The keys presented here will help you identify the areas where you can make some changes. The first step to taking charge is simply to give yourself permission to be in charge, and begin expecting your children to obey you. With this solid foundation you will build a loving, trusting relationship with your children. And, perhaps even more important, you will be able to lead your children into adulthood with values, wisdom and life skills that only a strong, supportive parent can impart.

Key #2: Tell, don't ask. One popular mistake parents make is asking instead of telling. The way you phrase your words determines whether your children see your request as optional or required. Banish all wishy-washy phrases from your vocabulary. When you want your child to do something (or stop doing something) make a clear, specific statement that leaves no room for confusion. Take a look at the difference between these two types of requests:

1) OPTIONAL 2) REQUIRED
1) It would be nice if somebody cleaned. 2) Steven, please put all the toys up in this family room and back in the playroom. Kyle, please gather the dishes and put them in the dishwasher.
1) Kids, don't you think it's time to get ready for bed? 2) It's eight o'clock. Time to shut off the TV and put on your pajamas.
1) I sure wish you'd get down from there. That's not a place to climb. 2) Please get down.
1) Gather up your stuff now, okay? 2) Please get your backpack, jacket and shoes.

Key #3: When you say it, mean it. The first time. Some parents are in the habit of repeating a request over and over and over (and over!) before taking any action to see that a child complies with the request. Do you know anyone like this? (Perhaps intimately?) Children have radar that tells them exactly when adults really mean what they say, and when they don't. Some parents really mean it only after repeatedly ignored requests. This is usually highlighted by a red face, a tense body, a child's middle name clenched between gnashing teeth, and a fist pounding the table to the tune of, "...and I mean it young man!" Make yourself a promise to mean what you say - the first time you say it. What this means is that after you've made a clear statement of what is required (see Key #2) you take action. For example, if you call your child in from the yard and he doesn't immediately respond you will have to put forth the extra effort to go out to the yard, take him by the hand and announce, "When I call you I expect you to come." The beauty of this style is that you only have to "prove" yourself once or twice for your child to understand that, indeed, when you say it you mean it. The first time. (For those with older children who have already learned that they can ignore you the first few times with no repercussions, it may take more "proving" before they believe that you have really changed. Your children can learn to believe that when you say it you mean it. Hang in there. Be consistent. It's definitely worth the effort.)

Key #4: Be brief and specific. There is a disease that is rampant among parents. It's called lecture-babble-itis. The most obvious symptom is an emotional run-on sentence that goes on forever, punctuated by highlights of previous award wining monologues. As an example, you send your children upstairs with a polite request to get ready for bed. Half an hour later you discover that they're having a pillow fight. The parent infected with lecture-babble-itis says, "I sent you kids up here thirty minutes ago to get ready for bed and nobody's even STARTING to get ready and it's after eight o'clock and it's a school night and WHY do we have to go through this EVERY single night couldn't you just ONCE get ready for bed without my getting angry about it and why is this room such a MESS again can't you ever ....." (Is it any wonder why kids roll their eyes?) There is a cure for this dreaded disease. It involves making an effort to talk less, but say more. In other words, be very specific in your description, but use as few words as necessary. Even when the kids have ignored the first polite request, the above disastrous speech can be transformed into something like this, "Kids, it's eight thirty. Pajamas. Now." As you can see, this statement is clear and short. It is easy to understand. The advantages of using this technique are twofold. Your kids will cooperate more frequently with a brief, specific statement than they will with a lengthy tirade. And, it's fun and easy for you to do this!

Key #5: Don't give in to nagging, whining and pressure. Many parents start out on the right track, but are derailed by an incredibly persistent child. It seems that when children couple their youthful energy with an extraordinary ability to pinpoint their parent's weak spots, the result is disaster. If you're doing your job as a parent there are many times when your decisions won't be popular with your kids. When your child is nagging, whining and pleading with you, it's a sure sign that you've made the right decision. It's also a sign that you need to disengage from your youngster and teach him that you won't be swayed by his persistence. Your most important goal as a parent is NOT to make your children happy on a short-term basis. It's to raise capable, responsible human beings. There are many times when your children will be unhappy with your decisions. Usually, this means you've made the right decision! We have an incredible amount of information and knowledge at our fingertips, more than any other generation of parents in our history. Take advantage of this information. Read. Think. And be confident in your actions.

Key #6: Give choices, ask questions. A primary goal of all children is to become independent. Instead of fighting against this very natural process, a wise parent will use it to his advantage. As an example, let's look at the very common problem of a child's messy bedroom. A parent can rightly expect that a child's room be neat and clean. A typical mistake is for the parent to demand that the child clean it - on the parent's time schedule, and to the parent's exact specifications. The typical child responds with a full-blown temper tantrum, which ignites the parent's adult-sized temper tantrum, which results in a lot of anger, and a still-messy room. A better choice is to engage the child's decision-making skills and utilize his desire to be in control of his own room and his own life. A parent might offer several well-thought-out choices, such as, "Would you like to clean your room after school today, or would you prefer to do it after baseball practice tomorrow?" Another choice might be, "What would you like to do first, change your bedding or vacuum your carpet?" Yet another choice would be, "Would you like to clean your room yourself, or shall I help you?" It's clear that a child will respond better to any of these choices than he would to the statement, "Clean your room and do it now." Another way to approach this problem is to ask helpful questions and direct the child into coming up with solutions on his own. Therefore you might ask, "I notice that your homework is scattered all over your room. Do you think it might be easier to keep track of if you create a 'homework place'? How can I help you solve this problem?" Yet another example of this approach is to take the time to discuss the issue with your child and ask for his ideas. "I know the mess in your room doesn't bother you, but I find it difficult to change your bed or put away your clothes. Can you help me come up with some solutions?" As you can see, any of these techniques provide the parent with a variety of ways to encourage the child to become involved in solving the problem.

Key #7: Use rules and routines. Chores, homework, mealtime, bedtime, getting out the door in the morning. These are the things life is made of. If you have very specific rules and routines you will find that things flow. If you don't - chaos. It's well worth the time to establish family priorities, rules and schedules for the usual daily routines. The first part of this key takes more than a few minutes of thought. You'll need to sit down and take time to ponder your daily activities. You'll need to make some decisions about priorities and what's most important in your family. Once you've done this, create charts to cover the steps involved in each major task, such as the morning routine, the after school routine, or the bedtime routine. Purchase and post a large family calendar to show all the family activities and commitments. (This helps the adults in the family stay organized just as much as it helps the kids!) A second part of this key is to evaluate your expectations for your children. Create a list of rules. These rules should cover expected behavior by clearly identifying two things: what is NOT allowed AND what behavior IS expected. In other words, listing, "No fighting" as a family rule is only the first part of the equation. "Be kind and respectful to each other" clarifies the important concluding concept. When everyone knows what to expect you'll find yourself nagging and complaining much less, and the kids cooperating much more.

Key #8: Build a foundation of love, trust and respect. Imagine that you've been invited to a friend's home for dinner. Your friend welcomes you at the door and you step inside. Suddenly, your host shouts, "What is the matter with you! Your shoes are all muddy and you're getting my carpet dirty!" Embarrassed you mumble, "Sorry" and remove your shoes. As you do, you notice the hole in your sock, and so does your friend, who announces, "Geez. Don't you think you could have dressed properly for dinner? You look like a slob." As you take your place at the table, your host knocks your elbow off the table with a whispered "tsk, tsk". The dinner conversation is primarily your friend's story about a guest that joined them for dinner last night who had lovely manners and no holes in her socks. The story is sprinkled with your friend's occasional corrections to your table manners. When you finish your meal you stand up only to hear your friend say, "It sure would be nice if somebody helped clear the table." I'm sure you get my drift by now. Many parents treat their children in ways that they would never treat a friend. In their efforts to raise respectable children, they become so focused on the end goal that they don't realize that the primary message coming though to their children is not a pleasant one. Take a close look at your daily interactions with your children. Make sure that the primary message to them is, "I love you, I trust you, and I respect you." Children who are confident that they loved, trusted and respected by the important adults in their lives will respond overall in a much more pleasant way. How do you get this message through to your children? First, by giving them what they want most from you - your time. It's much more effective to give small chunks of time every day than to try to pack in a "quality" experience once a month. Second, give them your ear. Children thrive when they have someone who really listens to them. It's not as important to give advice and solve problems as it is to just plain listen. Third, praise and encourage your children daily. Look for reasons, both big and small, to give your children positive feedback. Fourth, tell them you love them. Tell them you trust them. Tell them you respect them. Use your words, and your actions to convey this most important message of all, "I love you, I trust you, and I respect you."

Key #9: Think first, act second. The times when you act before you think reflect the worst moments in parenting. Those are the times when you lose your patience; those horrible moments when you screech, bellow, threaten or hit. These moments occur most often to parents who are unprepared for the parenting job. None of us are born knowing how to be parents. We can love our kids with our whole heart and soul, but we aren't born with a gene that gives us an instinctual knowledge of the right consequence to impart when our children misbehave, nor do we automatically know how to solve daily child rearing problems. We won't learn a Perfect Parenting process by chance. It takes research, thought and planning to decide upon the best solution to any problem.

Don't think any chef, no matter how skilled, could enter my kitchen and without any direction, recipe or ingredients end up creating a four-course meal with a five-star desert. It would increase the odds of our having a delicious meal if that person had access to my best cookbook, and passage to the local grocery store. In much the same way, you will be a much more successful parent if you have access to ideas and solutions whenever you come across a parenting problem. Perfect Parenting is your guidebook to a multitude of ideas. Use it as your basis to create thoughtful, purposeful solutions to your parenting problems. Whenever you come across a situation that baffles you or creates strife in your family life, take a few minutes to look up the ideas for that entry and any others that are similar. Contemplate how the ideas fit into your parenting style, how they match up to the personality of your child, and how they might work for you. Then create a plan of action. And follow through. Enjoy the benefits of this handbook of knowledge. Enjoy the benefits of thinking before you act. Enjoy the benefits of perfect parenting!

How to Encourage a Love of Reading

2006-07-06T12:29:00.000+08:00

It's unlikely that your child will begin to learn how to read before the age of three or four, but there are things you can do from birth to encourage early reading. Teach your child to love books and he or she will be reading before you know it. There are several ways you can do this, and they are fun, easy, and worth every minuet of your time.

10 Ways to Encourage a Love of Reading

Expand children's oral language. Depending on their skill level, children can read a story or have a story read to them, or even take turns reading and listening. When the story is finished, invite your child to identify favorite parts of the story. Reading stories together enables the child to have fun picking out words and deciding when to move to the next page.
Read several stories every day to children. The more children are exposed to stories and other literary works, the more likely that reading will become part of their daily lives. Each story introduces new concepts, phonemic awareness and much more.
Teach children rhymes and songs. Growing up, we were all exposed to rhymes, jingles and songs. Many of them might resonate in our minds even today. Rhymes and songs are creative ways to encourage memorization, rhyming and melody with children. This is also a great way to introduce poetry and other creative writing styles. Families can sing together on trips, on walks or at the table as an after dinner activity. Add hand gestures or dance moves to enrich the overall experience.
Support reading and writing development through children's play. After a day of family fun, encourage your child to write a story about the experience. Or, sit down with your child and write a play. Gather friends and other family members to put on a show.
Point at the words occasionally when you read with children. Pointing to words helps children understand that written words on a page stand for meanings they already know. It also shows that 1) written words are associated with sounds and 2) a word is a unit of print, which are two main goals of the Head Start program.
Encourage children to experiment with writing every day. Promote writing in a fun way. Help your child keep a daily journal about their experiences. Encourage your child to write and mail a letter to a different family member every week or even become a pen pal with a student from the other neighborhood school. Children love to receive mail, and it will make your child's day to read her own name on the front of an envelope.
Provide children a special area where they can experiment with print and books. Choose a place in the house designated especially for reading. Purchase a beanbag or a colorful chair to make the area inviting and fun. Books can be stored on a special bookshelf nearby. A unique environment might help parents with reluctant readers.
Be a literacy advocate by modeling reading and writing every day. Children learn by example in every realm of their life. If parents incorporate reading into their own lives, there will be a good chance their children will as well. Encourage your child to set reading goals and when they achieve them, give recognition and rewards.
Encourage children to notice print and how words are read and spelled. When reading with your child, take turns noticing sounds, letters and their relationship to the meaning within the context of the sentence and the story as a whole. Correct letter formation and spelling will help children on their spelling and grammar tests.
Encourage a special time each day for enjoying books and writing. Set up a time each day for reading. Both you and your child can read together or separately. Young children need as many special times with books and other literature as they can get.

Effects Of Television On Children

2006-07-05T23:11:00.000+08:00

Is it important to know what your kids are watching? Of course it is. Television can expose your child to things that you have tried to protect them from, especially violence, drug abuse, sex, etc. In addition to the actual television show, your child can also be influenced by what she sees during the commercials.

You can begin to choose proper shows for your children to watch by learning about television guidelines or using a V-Chip, but that may not screen out all inappropriate shows. Even television with a rating of 'Y' for all children or 'G' for general audiences may not be totally free of violence.

To help parents protect their children from the negative effects of watching too much television, the American Academy of Pediatrics has recommended that they 'limit children's total media time (with entertainment media) to no more than 1 to 2 hours of quality programming per day.'

What are some of the negative effects of watching too much television?

One study, Television-viewing habits and sleep disturbance in school children, found that watching too much TV during the day or at bedtime often caused 'bedtime resistance, sleep onset delay, and anxiety around sleep, followed by shortened sleep duration.'
Another study, Television viewing and aggressive behavior during adolescence and adulthood, found a 'significant association between the amount of time spent watching television during adolescence and early adulthood and the likelihood of subsequent aggressive acts against others.'
Many studies have found an association between kids watching a lot of TV, being inactive and overweight.

It doesn't take a research study for parents to discover how TV can affect your child's behavior. How do kids act after watching the Power Rangers? You will find most boys jumping around, hitting and kicking. That doesn't mean that the show will make your child violent, but if he is already aggressive and has problems hitting others, watching these types of shows will likely not help matters.

And if your child is inside all day watching TV, then he can't be outside playing and being involved in more physical activities.

Still, there are many good shows on TV that are not violent, which can teach your child positive values and which have good characters that find healthy ways to resolve conflicts and solve problems. Some good picks for younger children include:

Sesame Street
Barney & Friends
Mister Rogers' Neighborhood
Bob The Builder
Bear in the Big Blue House
Arthur
Dragon Tales
Clifford the Big Red Dog
Rollie Pollie Ollie
Blue's Clues
Dora Explorer
Thomas the Tank Engine
Spongebob Squarepants

Older kids will likely enjoy:

Bill Nye the Science Guy
Wishbone
Beakman's World

The most important thing to remember is that just because a show is a cartoon, it doesn't mean that it is good for your child to watch.

Shows that you may want to avoid, especially if your child is under age 7 include:

Power Rangers
Digimon
Ed, Edd n Eddy
Johnny Bravo
Power Puff Girls

The only real way to know if a show is appropriate for your child is to watch a few episodes, either before you let your child watch, or with your child, and then ask yourself some questions:

What are the characters doing?
What is the main story or theme of the episode?
Do the characters fight a lot?
Do the characters make fun of each other?
Are they doing anything illegal or that with an adult theme?
How does your child act after watching the show?

When deciding what shows your family should watch, keep in mind that the TV Parental Guidelines and/or the use of a V-Chip does not substitute for your responsibility to guard your children from the influence of inappropriate television shows. Some tips to protect your children include:

Limit television viewing to 1-2 hours each day.
Do not allow your children to have a TV set in their bedrooms.
Review the ratings of TV shows that your children watch.
Watch television with your children, and discuss what is happening during the show, discuss alternative and more acceptable things that characters could have done for inappropriate behaviors and actions, and teach your children to be critical of the messages that the media sends through their programming.

Effective Communication With Your Children

2006-07-04T22:19:00.000+08:00

Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible - the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.
- Virginia Satir

Effective communication skills are essential in determining our ability to have rewarding relations with others and to achieve satisfaction in life. The quality of our relationships with friends, spouses, children, and colleagues are all dependent upon sound communication skills.

Ten Steps To Effectively Communicate With Your Children

Set a time each day to talk to and get to know your children. Good times to talk are in the car on the way to school or at the dinner table. Have meals together as a family as often as possible.
Encourage your children to talk to you. Be supportive, accepting, non- judgmental and understanding, without encouraging self-destructive behaviors, of course. Listen more than you talk. Make eye contact. Smile when appropriate.
Stimulate curiosity and imagination by asking thought-provoking questions about your children’s opinions and values on various issues. Include your children in family discussions.
Express love and affection frequently. Hug and touch your children, no matter how old they are. Keep your sense of humor. Avoid criticism, sarcasm, and hurtful teasing.
Be honest and patient with your children. Be accepting and consistent. Admit when you are wrong and apologize when appropriate.
Relax and have fun with your children. Engage in activities that everyone might enjoy such as taking a walk, cooking, playing games, and visiting museums. Choose activities that include chances to talk. If you go to a film together, go out to eat before or after.
Work to understand their questions. Ask for more information and draw them out. Their viewpoints, though different, can be valuable and thought-provoking for you, too.
Remember how it felt to be their age. Growing up can be difficult and confusing. Educate yourself on issues that children face, such as drugs and sex. Know what they are watching, reading, and listening to.
Let them know you respect their point of view, taking the time to explain how you feel, listening to and respecting their opinions. Don’t interrupt.
Encourage children to see the best in themselves and recognize their unique potential. Help build their self-esteem by supporting their interests and giving positive feedback and praise through encouraging words.

Causes Of Childhood Schizophrenia

2006-07-03T22:01:00.000+08:00

Although it's unclear whether schizophrenia has a single or multiple underlying causes, evidence suggests that it is a neurodevelopmental disease likely involving a genetic predisposition, a prenatal insult to the developing brain and stressful life events. The role of genetics has long been established; the risk of schizophrenia rises from 1 percent with no family history of the illness, to 10 percent if a first degree relative has it, to 50 percent if an identical twin has it. Prenatal insults may include viral infections, such as maternal influenza in the second trimester, starvation, lack of oxygen at birth, and untreated blood type incompatibility. Studies find that children share with adults many of the same abnormal brain structural, physiological and neuropsychological features associated with schizophrenia. The children seem to have more severe cases than adults, with more pronounced neurological abnormalities. This makes childhood onset schizophrenia potentially one of the clearest windows available for research into a still obscure illness process.

For example, unlike most adult-onset patients, children who become psychotic prior to puberty show conspicuous evidence of progressively abnormal brain development. In the first longitudinal brain imaging study of adolescents, magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scans revealed fluid filled cavities in the middle of the brain enlarging abnormally between ages 14 and 18 in teens with early onset schizophrenia, suggesting a shrinkage in brain tissue volume. These children lost four times as much gray matter, neurons and their branch-like extensions, in their frontal lobes as normally occurs in teens. This gray matter loss engulfs the brain in a progressive wave from back to front over 5 years, beginning in rear structures involved in attention and perception, eventually spreading to frontal areas responsible for organizing, planning, and other "executive" functions impaired in schizophrenia. Since losses in the rear areas are influenced mostly by environmental factors, the researchers suggest that some non-genetic trigger contributes to the onset and initial progression of the illness. The final loss pattern is consistent with that seen in adult schizophrenia. Adult-onset patients' brains may have undergone similar changes when they were teens that went unnoticed because symptoms had not yet emerged, suggest the researchers.

In addition to studies of brain structural abnormalities, researchers are also examining a group of measures associated with genetic risk for schizophrenia. Early onset cases of illness have recently proven crucial in the discovery of genes linked to other genetically complex disorders like breast cancer, Alzheimer's and Crohn's diseases. Hence, children with schizophrenia and their families may play an important role in deciphering schizophrenia's molecular roots. Evidence suggests that the rate of genetically-linked abnormalities is twice as high in children as in adults with the illness. Similarly, schizophrenia spectrum disorders, thought to be genetically-related to schizophrenia, are about twice as prevalent among first-degree relatives of childhood onset patients. In one recent study, a third of the families of individuals with childhood onset schizophrenia had at least one first-degree relative with a diagnosis of schizophrenia, or schizotypal or paranoid personality disorder. This profile of psychiatric illness is remarkably similar to that seen in parents of adult onset patients, adding to the likelihood that both forms share common genetic roots. Other anomalies associated with adult schizophrenia, such as abnormal eye movements, are also more common in families of children with the illness.

Families of children with schizophrenia who are interested in participating in research are encouraged to fill out the NIMH Childhood-Onset Schizophrenia Survey, to help determine eligibility for studies.

Can schizophrenia be inherited?

Scientists have long known that schizophrenia runs in families. It occurs in 1 percent of the general population, but is seen in 10 percent of people with a first degree relative (a parent, brother, or sister) with the disorder. People who have second degree relatives (aunts, uncles, grandparents, or cousins) with the disease also develop schizophrenia more often than the general population. The identical twin of a person with schizophrenia is most at risk, with a 40-65 percent chance of developing the problem.

Our genes are located on 23 pairs of chromosomes that are found in each cell. We inherit two copies of each gene, one from each parent. Several of these genes are thought to be associated with an increased risk of schizophrenia, but scientists currently believe that each gene has a very small effect and is not responsible for causing the disease by itself. It is still not possible to predict who will develop the disease by looking at their genetic material.

Although there is a genetic risk for schizophrenia, genes alone are not likely to be sufficient to cause the disorder. Interactions between genes and the environment are thought to be necessary for schizophrenia to develop. Many environmental factors have been suggested as risk factors, such as exposure to viruses or malnutrition in the womb, problems during birth, and psychosocial factors, like stressful environmental conditions.

Do people with schizophrenia have faulty brain chemistry?

It is likely that an imbalance in the complex, interrelated chemical reactions of the brain involving the neurotransmitters dopamine and glutamate (and possibly others) plays a role in schizophrenia. Neurotransmitters are substances that allow brain cells to communicate with one another. Basic knowledge about brain chemistry and its link to schizophrenia is expanding rapidly and is a very promising area of research.

Do the brains of people with schizophrenia look different?

The brains of people with schizophrenia look a little different than the brains of healthy people, but the differences are small. Sometimes the fluid-filled cavities at the center of the brain, called ventricles, are larger in people with schizophrenia, overall grey matter volume is lower, and some areas of the brain have less or more metabolic activity. Microscopic studies of brain tissue after death have also revealed small changes in the distribution or characteristics of brain cells in people with schizophrenia. It appears that many of these changes were prenatal because they are not accompanied by glial cells, which are always present when a brain injury occurs after birth. One theory suggests that problems during brain development lead to faulty connections that lie dormant until puberty. The brain undergoes major changes during puberty, and these changes could trigger psychotic symptoms.

The only way to answer these questions is to conduct more research. Scientists in the U.S. and all over the world are studying schizophrenia and trying to develop new ways to prevent and treat the disorder.

Symptoms & Diagnosis Of Childhood Schizophrenia

2006-07-02T21:35:00.000+08:00

A child's stage of development must be taken into account when considering a diagnosis of mental illness.

Behaviors that are normal at one age, may not be at another. Rarely, a normal young child may report strange experiences—such as hearing voices—that would be considered abnormal at a later age. Clinicians look for a more persistent pattern of such behaviors. Parents may have reason for concern if a child of 7 years or older often hears voices saying derogatory things about him or her, or voices conversing with one another, talks to himself or herself, stares at scary things—snakes, spiders, shadows—that aren't really there, and shows no interest in friendships. Such behaviors could be signs of schizophrenia, a chronic and disabling form of mental illness.

Fortunately, schizophrenia is rare in children, affecting only about 1 in 40,000, compared to 1 in 100 in adults. The average age of onset is 18 in men and 25 in women. Ranking among the top 10 causes of disability in developed countries worldwide, schizophrenia, at any age, exacts a heavy toll on patients and their families.

Children with schizophrenia experience difficulty in managing everyday life. They share with their adult counterparts hallucinations, delusions, social withdrawal, flattened emotions, increased risk of suicide and loss of social and personal care skills. They may also share some symptoms with—and be mistaken for—children who suffer from autism or other pervasive developmental disabilities, which affect about 1 in 500 children. Although they tend to be harder to treat and have a worse prognosis than adult-onset schizophrenia patients, researchers are finding that many children with schizophrenia can be helped by the new generation of anti-psychotic medications.

Symptoms and Diagnosis

While schizophrenia sometimes begins as an acute psychotic episode in young adults, it emerges gradually in children, often preceded by developmental disturbances, such as lags in motor and speech/language development. Such problems tend to be associated with more pronounced brain abnormalities. The diagnostic criteria are the same as for adults, except that symptoms appear prior to age 12, instead of in the late teens or early 20s.

Children with schizophrenia often see or hear things that don't really exist, and harbor paranoid and bizarre beliefs. For example, they may think people are plotting against them or can read their minds. Other symptoms of the disorder include problems paying attention, impaired memory and reasoning, speech impairments, inappropriate, or flattened, expression of emotion, poor social skills, and depressed mood. Such children may laugh at a sad event, make poor eye contact, and show little body language or facial expression.

Misdiagnosis of schizophrenia in children is all too common. It is distinguished from autism by the persistence of hallucinations and delusions for at least 6 months, and a later age of onset—7 years or older. Autism is usually diagnosed by age 3. Schizophrenia is also distinguished from a type of brief psychosis sometimes seen in affective, personality and dissociative disorders in children. Adolescents with bipolar disorder sometimes have acute onset of manic episodes that may be mistaken for schizophrenia. Children who have been victims of abuse may sometimes claim to hear voices of—or see visions of—the abuser. Symptoms characteristically pervade the child's life, and are not limited to just certain situations, such as at school. If children show any interest in friendships, even if they fail at maintaining them, it's unlikely that they have schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia In Children

2006-07-01T21:24:00.000+08:00

What is Schizophrenia?
Schizophrenia is a medical illness that causes strange thinking, abnormal feelings, and unusual behavior. It is an uncommon psychiatric illness in children and is hard to recognize in its early phases. The behavior of children and teens with schizophrenia may differ from that of adults with this illness.

Mounting evidence indicates that schizophrenia has neurodevelopmental roots. The appearance of schizophrenic symptoms before age 12 is rare (less than one-sixtieth as common as the adult-onset type), but studying these cases is important for an understanding of this disorder.

Neurodevelopmental damage seems to be greater in childhood schizophrenia than in the adult-onset type. Most schizophrenic children show delays in language and other functions long before their psychotic symptoms (hallucinations, delusions, and disordered thinking) appear, usually at age seven or later. In the first years of life, about 30% of these children have transient symptoms of pervasive developmental disorder, such as rocking, posturing, and arm flapping. Childhood home movies indicate uneven motor development, such as unusual crawling, in adult-onset schizophrenic patients. Children with schizophrenia may be even more seriously impaired in this respect; they are also more anxious and disruptive than adult-onset schizophrenic patients were as children.

Early Warning Signs:

trouble discerning dreams from reality
seeing things and hearing voices that are not real
confused thinking
vivid and bizarre thoughts and ideas
extreme moodiness
peculiar behavior
concept that people are “out to get them”
behaving younger than chronological age
severe anxiety and fearfulness
confusing television or movies with reality
severe problems in making and keeping friends

The behavior of children with this illness may change over time. The schizophrenic psychosis develops gradually in children, without the sudden psychotic break that sometimes occurs in adolescents and adults. Children may begin talking about strange fears and ideas. They may start to cling to parents or say things that do not make sense. Children who used to enjoy relationships with others may become more shy or withdrawn and seem to be in their own world.

Treatment
Early diagnosis and medical treatment are important. Children with the problems and symptoms listed above must have a complete evaluation. These children may need individual treatment plans involving other professionals. A combination of medication and individual therapy, family therapy, and specialized programs (school, activities, etc.) is often necessary. Psychiatric medication can be helpful for many of the symptoms and problems identified.

Standard antipsychotic drugs appear to be effective for schizophrenic children and adolescents, and the atypical drug clozapine is helpful for at least half of those who do not respond to typical drugs. In a few cases their psychotic symptoms seem to disappear entirely. Unfortunately, children may be more susceptible than adults to the toxic effects of clozapine; about one third of them have to stop taking it because of the side effects. Newer antipsychotic drugs that may be safer and just as effective are now being tested.

Parents need to ask their family physician or pediatrician to refer them to a child and adolescent psychiatrist who is specifically trained and skilled at evaluating, diagnosing, and treating children with schizophrenia.

Lazy Children

2006-06-30T23:52:00.000+08:00

THE controversy as to whether people must be driven by fear of hunger or of punishment to do their work will probably continue for many years to come. But it should not be difficult for the parent who really cares, to make up his mind as to the best way of getting his own children to do their share of the world's work. We have used the word " lazy " to cover up a heap of ignorance about human nature, and it is the easiest thing in the world to resort to this adjective—certainly much easier than trying to understand people, and especially children.

Those who have given most attention to the problem of child nature are pretty well agreed that it is impossible for a healthy boy or girl to be lazy. It is a contradiction of terms to say that a young human being would prefer to do nothing. Indeed, it is the irresistible impulse to be up and doing that makes the healthy child so much of a nuisance to people who wish to have everything quiet and " orderly." The first thing to do when a child shows symptoms of "laziness," is to have him thoroughly examined by a competent physician.

Now this sounds as though we considered laziness a disease. And several years ago when Dr. Stiles of the U. S. Public Health Service announced his discoveries in regard to the hookworm, it was quite the fashion for respectable people (who have a great deal of contempt for lazy folks) and for the newspapers to think up jokes about the " laziness germ." But seriously, laziness is very commonly an indication of impaired health, if not of actual disease. This is especially true when it occurs in young children. When a child sits or lies about without caring to do anything, without even getting into mischief, there is generally something wrong.

But perhaps we all know older children who are " pictures of health " and at the same time lazy enough to exasperate their parents and teachers. When we have made sure that the picture of health is not a deceptive appearance, it is time to look for other causes, and not till then. Judging from the experience of the schools, there are lazy children who have good health. But the usual attitude toward indifference to work is hardly effective in making children get over it. To scold and to drive may help in getting a particular task finished, but they have not been very helpful in establishing habits of industry. And that is the whole problem, in most cases—to establish habits of industry.

By nature the child adapts himself very readily to the establishment of such habits. In the first place there are the instincts for activity, the native curiosity and the imitativeness. And in the next place, there is the ease with which repeated acts become organized into habit. Could anything be easier than making a child get into the habit of doing something all of his waking time? But children do certainly grow up " lazy "; so what can be the trouble? We are quite sure that it cannot be anything wrong with his muscles, for example, because the amount of energy that a child puts into his play after he is tired out by his " work," is enough to do the work several times over. That ought to give us a clew. The energy that is expended in play has meaning to the child; too often the energy required of him in work-whether it is home work or school work or work that earns money—has no meaning to him whatever. In other words, where there is interest and enthusiasm there is effort and exertion ; when there is indifference or repugnance, there is lethargy and indolence. Children will acquire the habits of industry only where they have practice in exerting themselves with purpose and enthusiasm.

But we cannot let the children play all the time ; it is necessary to study, sometimes, and to do other things that are not very pleasant in themselves. Indeed that is true. But it has been found possible to organize study and other necessary work in such a way as to get the children to do it cheerfully and effectively, and so to get the habit of doing what needs to be done without shirking and without complaining. To most older people this would seem to be demoralizing; but experience shows that work done under conditions that arouse interest is at least as valuable for " discipline " as work done under compulsion. For children can certainly learn the various processes involved in the handling of tools, for example, by making things in which they are interested; and they can as easily acquire skill in such work as in monotonous work. But the " moral " habit of application to the disagreeable for the purpose of carrying out a more remote end, which is the essential thing in what we call our " discipline," has been. successfully developed by parents and teachers who have known how to use interest in leading children from play to work.

It is the children who have been driven to do the unpleasant things that have no meaning for them who resort to " laziness " as the only escape from the disagreeable tasks. They have never learned to be interested either in the work itself, or in the work as a means to something desirable, that should crown all labor. They have acquired laziness because their impulses to activity had been thwarted by association with stupid, monotonous, fatiguing effort.

And this suggests a third type of laziness. In spite of the beautiful poems and the stirring orations on the " dignity of labor " the children do not have to be very shrewd to discover that society honors many of its members in inverse proportion to the amount of useful work they do. It is a short step to acquire a contempt for real honest work, since the workers that the child sees about him receive anything but respect from " the better classes." If a clever girl or boy half-unconsciously makes up his mind that it does not pay to work, if he adopts the attitude expressed by the cant phrase " Let George do it," we must look seriously to the conditions that make for laziness in our own habits and views of life.

Finally, there are a few children who naturally take to the contemplative life—they are dreamers, poets, philosophers. They have their uses even if they do not do " useful work."

Helping Children With Poor Grades

2006-06-29T00:14:00.000+08:00

Are your children scoring poor percentages or grades in studies? If yes, then don't worry.

You can help your children improve their study performance. Here are six things you can do to bring faster improvement in your children:

1. Do Not Attach Negative labels

Do not label your children with degrading titles like: “useless,” “Stupid,” “Lazy,” and other negative names which create poor self-image. Firmly believe that your children are capable of achieving anything they really desire.

2. Find Out Your Children’s Difficulties or Problems

Children who do not perform well in studies have some problems. These problems can be solved if identified. To identify problems, observe your children closely and ask them questions. Here are examples of some common problems of children:

Complaining about classmates/teachers
Coming from school tired and irritated
Good in one subject but not in another
Slow reading and understanding of study material
Avoiding homework until the last minute
Finding it difficult to interact with other children and adults
Spending time on unimportant activities
Learning little or nothing in class
Problems with eyesight or hearing
Not enthusiastic in going to school
Being disobedient and/or sulky

Once you identify your children’s problem, it will become easy for you to think and find solutions for it.

3. Increase Your Children’s Self-Confidence

This is one of the best ways to improve your children’s performance. Search for some good study habits or skills of your children and talk about it.

No matter how poorly your children are performing right now, there might be some topic or study skill in which they are good.

For example: your son might be good in spelling, or reading or drawing diagrams. Your daughter might be good in math or biology or in remembering formulas.

Think about it and praise your children for their good skills.

Also, search for some study-related achievements of your children in the past and discuss it with them.

For example: perhaps your son had got ‘good’ remarks on his science report. Or perhaps your daughter had scored better grades in some subjects last year, or even year before that.

Discuss such past study related success. Remind your children about their achievements, however small it is.

This will shift your children’s mental focus on their good study-skills, on their study-success. They will realize that they do have the ability to learn, the power to win.

Tell your children, “if you can learn one thing, you can also learn many other things. If you can achieve success once, you can achieve it again.”

Such talking from you will strongly motivate your children.

4. Talk With Their Teacher

Meet your children’s teachers and discuss your children’s study performance with them. Ask them what is wrong with your children, and what you can do to help them improve.

Advice and suggestions of teachers will help you immensely.
5. Help Your Children Set Achievable Goals

When children have clear goals in their mind, they usually make efforts to study better. Hence encourage your children to set small and reasonable goals for their studies.

For example, if your daughter has scored C grade in math test, she can set a goal to score B grade in next math test. If your son has fallen behind in his History class, then he can set a goal to read two or three history lessons each week, depending upon his speed.

6. Help Your Children Stay Fit

Encourage your children to get some physical exercise. Like, running, jogging, skipping, cycling, swimming, etc.

Exercise improves blood circulation, digestion, and provides more oxygen to brain. This leads to better learning and memory. Ask your children to exercise everyday, or at least five days a week.

Finally, remember what Edison’s mother did!

Thomas Edison was labeled as “slow learner” by his teachers. But his mother, Nancy Edison, did not accept her son as ‘dull.’ She motivated, encouraged, and taught Edison to learn at his own speed and style.

And we all know what Edison went on to achieve in his life.

So support, encourage, motivate. These are the key words to help your children improve their performance. Scolding and shouting at them will not you help much.

Diagnosis & Treatment Of OCD

2006-06-19T02:31:00.000+08:00

Diagnosing OCD

In screening for OCD, your child's doctor or mental health professional will likely ask about your child's obsessions and compulsions in language that your child will understand, such as:

Do you have worries, thoughts, images, feelings, or ideas that bother you?
Do you have to check things over and over again?
Do you have to wash your hands a lot, more than most kids?
Do you count to a certain number or do things a certain number of times?
Do you collect things that others might throw away (like hair or fingernail clippings)?
Do things have to be "just so"?
Are there things you have to do before you go to bed?

Because it might be normal for a child who doesn't have OCD to answer yes to any of these questions, your child's doctor also will ask about your family's history of OCD, Tourette syndrome, and other motor or vocal tic disorders. OCD has a genetic component, which means that children whose family members have had any of these disorders may be more prone to OCD.

Tic disorders often resemble OCD symptoms: up to half of people with Tourette syndrome also have OCD (but only a small percentage of children with OCD also have Tourette syndrome).

Disorders that frequently occur with OCD include other anxiety disorders, depression, disruptive behavior disorders such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, learning disorders, trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling), and habit disorders such as nail biting or skin picking.

In rare cases, OCD symptoms or tics that come on very suddenly may be associated with a recent group A streptococcus infection (strep throat, or less commonly, scarlet fever). This phenomenon is known as PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections). No one knows for sure why PANDAS occurs. One theory is that strep infections trigger an antibody response in some children that causes changes in the basal ganglia, a part of the brain that has been implicated in OCD.

Of course, just because your child has had strep throat doesn't mean he or she will also have PANDAS. Almost all school-age children have strep throat at some point, and the vast majority recover with no complications. Similarly, most kids who have OCD or tics do not have PANDAS. The condition may be considered only if a child's OCD symptoms or tics are directly preceded by, or significantly worsen after, a strep infection.

Treating OCD

The most successful treatments for children with OCD are behavioral therapy and medication. Behavioral therapy, also known as cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy (CBT) helps a child learn to change thoughts and feelings by first changing behavior. It involves exposing the child to his or her fears to decrease the surrounding anxiety. For example, a child who is afraid of dirt might be exposed to something he or she considers dirty until the child no longer fears it.

For exposure to be successful, it is often combined with response prevention, in which the child's rituals or avoidance behaviors are blocked. For example, the child who fears dirt must not only stay in contact with the dirty object, he or she also must not be allowed to wash repeatedly. Some treatment plans involve having the child "bossing back" the OCD, giving it a nasty nickname, and visualizing it as something the child can control.

OCD can sometimes worsen if it's not treated in a consistent, logical, and supportive manner. So it's important to find a therapist who has training and experience in treating OCD. Family support and cooperation also go a long way toward helping a child cope with OCD.

Many kids can do well with behavioral therapy alone while others will need a combination of behavioral therapy and medication. Therapy can help your child and family learn strategies to manage the ebb and flow of OCD symptoms, while medication, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), often can reduce the impulse to engage in the ritualistic behavior.

You and your child's doctors should agree upon the most appropriate strategy to cope with your child's OCD.

How Can I Help My Child?

It's important to understand that OCD is never the child's fault. Once a child is in treatment, it's important for parents to participate, to learn more about OCD, and to modify expectations and be supportive. Keep in mind that kids with OCD get better at different rates so try to avoid any day-to-day comparisons of your child's behaviors, and recognize and praise any small improvements. Keep in mind that it's the OCD that is causing the problem, not the child. The more that personal criticism can be avoided, the better.

It's can be helpful to your child to keep family routines as normal as possible, and for all family members to learn strategies to help the child with OCD.

Signs and Symptoms of OCD

2006-06-18T02:25:00.000+08:00

Recognizing OCD is often difficult because a child can become adapt at hiding the behaviors. It's not uncommon for a child to engage in ritualistic behavior for months, or even years, before parents know about it. Also, a child may not engage in the ritual at school, so parents might think that the ritual is just a phase the child is going through.

When a child with OCD tries to contain these thoughts or behaviors, this creates anxiety. A child who feels embarrassed or as if he or she is "going crazy" may try to blend the OCD into the normal daily routine until he or she just can't contain it anymore.

It is common for a child to ask the parent to join him or her in the ritualistic behavior: First the child has to do something and then the parent has to do something else. If a child says, "I didn't touch something with germs, did I?" the parent might have to respond, "No, you're OK," and the ritual will begin again for a certain number of times. Initially, the parent might not notice what is happening. Tantrums, overt signs of worry, and difficult behaviors are common when parents fail to participate in their child's rituals. It is often this behavior, as much as the OCD itself, that brings families into treatment.

Parents can look for the following possible signs of OCD:

raw, chapped hands from constant washing
unusually high rate of soap or paper towel usage
high, unexplained utility bills
a sudden drop in test grades
unproductive hours spent doing homework
holes erased through test papers and homework
requests for family members to repeat strange phrases or keep answering the same question
a persistent fear of illness
a dramatic increase in laundry
an exceptionally long amount of time spent getting ready for bed
a continual fear that something terrible will happen to someone
constant checks of the health of family members
reluctance to leave the house at the same time as other family members

Environmental and stress factors can signal the onset of OCD. These can include ordinary developmental transitions (such as starting school) as well as significant losses or changes (such as the death of a loved one or moving).

Common OCD Behaviors in Children

2006-06-18T02:19:00.000+08:00

OCD can make daily life difficult for the kids that it affects and their families. The behaviors often take up a great deal of time and energy of the child with OCD, making it more difficult to complete tasks, such as homework or chores, or to enjoy life. In addition to feeling frustrated or guilty for not being able to control his or her own thoughts or actions, a child with OCD also may suffer from low self-esteem from the shame or embarrassment about what he or she is thinking or feeling.

A child with OCD also may feel pressured because he or she doesn't have enough time to do everything. The child might become irritable because he or she feels compelled to stay awake late into the night or miss an activity or outing to complete the compulsive rituals. The child might have difficulties with attention or concentration because of the intrusive thoughts.

It is common for these obsessions and compulsions to be related to food. A child with OCD might feel compelled to eat just a restricted range of foods, thus compromising his or her own nutrition needs.

Among kids and teens with OCD, the most common obsessions include:

fear of dirt or germs
fear of contamination
a need for symmetry, order, and precision
religious obsessions
preoccupation with body wastes
lucky and unlucky numbers
sexual or aggressive thoughts
fear of illness or harm coming to oneself or relatives
preoccupation with household items
intrusive sounds or words

The following compulsions are the most common among kids and teens:

grooming rituals, including hand washing, showering, and teeth brushing
repeating rituals, including going in and out of doorways, needing to move through spaces in a special way, checking to make sure that an appliance is off or a door is locked, and checking homework
rituals to undo contact with a "contaminated" person or object
touching rituals
rituals to prevent harming self or others
ordering or arranging objects
counting rituals
hoarding and collecting things
cleaning rituals related to the house or other items

OCD In Children

2006-06-17T02:17:00.000+08:00

All children have worries and doubts. But some kids and teens who have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) can't stop worrying, no matter how much they want the worrying to go away. Those worries compel them to behave in certain ways over and over again.

An estimated 2% of children in the United States experience OCD, which is characterized by a pattern of rituals and obsessive thinking that generally lasts more than an hour each day, causes a child distress, and interferes with daily activities. The condition is more prevalent than many other childhood disorders or illnesses, but kids often keep the symptoms hidden from their families because they're embarrassed about them.

OCD in children is usually diagnosed between the ages of 7 and 12. Since these are the years when kids naturally feel concerned about fitting in with their friends, the discomfort and stress brought on by OCD can make them feel scared, out of control, and alone.

If your child shows signs of OCD, talk to your child's doctor about ways to help your child to cope with these persistent thoughts and behaviors and not let them interfere with daily life. Family support and cooperation are crucial to successful treatment of OCD.

What Is OCD?

OCD is an anxiety disorder in which the brain gets stuck on a particular thought or urge and can't let go. OCD manifests itself in obsessive thinking or beliefs that tell a child: "If you don't do X, then something uncomfortable or even life-threatening will happen." Think of OCD as an "overactive alarm system." The rise in anxiety or worry is so strong that the child feels like he or she must perform the task or dwell on the thought, over and over again, to the point where it interferes with everyday life. Most children realize that they really don't have to repeat the behaviors over and over again, but the anxiety can be so great that they feel that repetition is "required" to neutralize the uncomfortable feeling.

Obsessions are repeated thoughts or impulses that are out of place - they cause the child to experience anxiety or distress. They're out of the child's control and different from normal thoughts. The child usually attempts to ignore or suppress obsessive thoughts or impulses by neutralizing them with another thought or action - a compulsion. For example, a child who is plagued with doubts about having turned off the stove might compulsively check the stove, again and again, to ensure that it is off.

Compulsions, or rituals, are the deliberate and repeated behaviors a child with OCD performs to relieve the anxiety caused by the obsessive thoughts. For example, a child who has a fear of germs may repeatedly wash his or her hands until the skin becomes raw; a child who has an obsession with neatness will redo a test paper so many times that he or she may tear a hole in it from constant erasing. Other times, compulsions might seem less clearly related to the obsessive thought.

In some young children, the compulsive behavior occurs without the obsessive thoughts beforehand.

It's important to understand that the obsessive-compulsive behavior is not something that a child with OCD can stop if he or she just tries harder. OCD is a disorder, just like any physical disorder - it's not something the child can control.

Coping With Loss Of Your Child

2006-06-16T01:58:00.000+08:00

What should you do if someone your child knows, perhaps a friend or a classmate, has attempted or committed suicide? First, acknowledge your child's many emotions. Some teens say they feel guilty - especially those who felt they could have interpreted their friend's actions and words better. Others say they feel angry with the person who committed or attempted suicide for having done something so selfish. Still others say they feel no strong emotions. All of these emotions are appropriate; stress to your child that there is no right or wrong way to feel.

When someone attempts suicide and survives, people may be afraid of or uncomfortable about talking with him or her about it. Tell your child to resist this urge; this is a time when a person absolutely needs to feel connected to others.

Many schools address a student's suicide by calling in special counselors to talk with the students and help them deal with their feelings. If your child is having difficulty dealing with a friend or classmate's suicide, it's best for him or her to make use of these resources or to talk to you or another trusted adult.

If You've Lost a Child to Suicide

For parents, the death of a child is probably the most painful loss imaginable. For parents who've lost a child to suicide, the pain and grief may be intensified. Although these feelings may never completely go away, there are some things that survivors of suicide can do to begin the healing process.

Maintain contact with others. Suicide can be a very isolating experience for surviving family members because friends often don't know what to say and how to help. Seek out supportive people with whom you can talk about your child and your feelings. If you find that those around you are uncomfortable talking about your child, initiate the conversation and ask for their help.
Remember that your other family members are grieving, too, and that everyone expresses grief in their own way. Your other children, in particular, may try to deal with their pain alone so as not to burden you with additional worries. Be there for each other through the tears, anger, and silences, and, if necessary, seek help and support together.
Expect that anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays may be difficult. Important days and holidays often reawaken a sense of loss and anxiety. On those days, do what's best for your emotional needs, whether that means surrounding yourself with family and friends or planning a quiet day of reflection.
Understand that it's normal to feel guilty and to question how this could have happened, but it's also important to realize that you may never get the answers you are looking for. The healing that takes place over time comes from reaching a point of forgiveness - for both your child and yourself.

Dealing With Kids/Teens Suicide

2006-06-14T01:49:00.000+08:00

Suicide among teens often occurs following a stressful life event, such as a perceived failure at school, a breakup with a boyfriend or girlfriend, the death of a loved one, a divorce, or a major family conflict.

A teen who is thinking about suicide may:

talk about suicide or death in general
talk about "going away"
talk about feeling hopeless or feeling guilty
pull away from friends or family
lose the desire to take part in favorite things or activities
have trouble concentrating or thinking clearly
experience changes in eating or sleeping habits
self-destructive behavior (drinking alcohol, taking drugs, or driving too fast, for example)

What Can Parents Do?

Most kids who commit or attempt suicide have given some type of warning to loved ones ahead of time. So as a parent, it's important that you are aware of some of the warning signs that your child may be suicidal, so that you can get your child the help that he or she needs.

Watch and Listen

If your child seems depressed and withdrawn, it's a good idea to watch him or her carefully. Poor grades, for example, may signal that your teen is withdrawing at school.

It's important that you keep the lines of communication open and express your concern, support, and love. If your child confides his or her concerns, it's important to show your child that you take those concerns seriously. Your child's fight with a friend may not seem like a big deal to you in the larger scheme of things, but for a teen, a situation like that can seem immense and consuming. It's important not to minimize or discount what your child is going through. This may increase his or her sense of hopelessness. Most people who attempt suicide have given some type of warning to loved ones.

If your child will not speak to you about how he or she is feeling, it's a good idea to suggest that your child talk to someone else who he or she feels comfortable confiding in. If your teen doesn't feel comfortable talking with you, you may want to suggest a more neutral person, such as another relative, a clergy member, a coach, a school counselor, or your child's doctor.

Ask Questions

Some parents are reluctant to ask teens if they have been thinking about suicide or hurting themselves. Some parents fear that if they ask, they will plant the idea of suicide in their child's head.

It's always a good idea to ask. Asking a person if he or she is having thoughts about suicide can be difficult. Sometimes it helps to let the person know why you are asking. For instance, you might say: "I've noticed that you've been talking a lot about wanting to be dead. Have you been having thoughts about trying to kill yourself?"

Get Help

If you learn that your child is thinking about suicide, get help immediately. Your child's doctor can refer you to a psychologist or psychiatrist, or your local hospital's department of psychiatry can provide a list of doctors in your area. Your local mental health association or county medical society can also provide references.

If your child is in an emergency situation, your local emergency room can conduct a comprehensive psychiatric evaluation and refer you to the appropriate resources. If you are unsure about whether you should bring your child to the emergency room, you can contact your doctor for help.

If you've scheduled an appointment for your child with a mental health professional, make sure to keep the appointment, even if your child says he or she is feeling better. Suicidal thoughts do tend to come and go; however, it is important that your child get help developing the skills necessary to decrease the likelihood that suicidal thoughts and behaviors will emerge again if a crisis arises in the future. If your child refuses to go to the appointment, discuss this with the mental health professional - you may consider attending the session and working with the clinician to make sure your child has access to the help he or she may need. The clinician might also be able to help you devise strategies to help your child want to get help.

Remember that any ongoing conflicts between a parent and child can fuel the fire for a teen who is feeling isolated, misunderstood, devalued, or suicidal. Get help to air family problems and resolve them in a constructive way. Also let the mental health professional know if there is a history of depression, substance abuse, family violence, or other stresses at home, such as an ongoing environment of criticism

Kids & Teens Suicide

2006-06-12T01:25:00.000+08:00

When a teen commits suicide, everyone is affected. Family members, friends, teammates, neighbors, and sometimes even those who didn't know the person well may experience feelings of grief, confusion, guilt - and the sense that if only they had done something differently, the suicide could have been prevented. The reasons behind a teen's suicide or attempted suicide are often complex.

To help sort through these issues, and to learn the warning signs that your teen might need help, it's important to understand the forces that often lead teens to suicide and to understand what you can do to help.

Suicide Statistics

Although suicide is relatively rare among children, the rate of suicide attempts and suicide deaths increases tremendously during adolescence. Suicide is the third-leading cause of death for 15- to 24-year-olds, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), surpassed only by accidents and homicide.

The risk of suicide increases dramatically when kids and teens have access to firearms at home, and nearly 60% of all suicides in the United States are committed with a gun. That's why it's important that any gun in your home be unloaded, locked, and kept out of the reach of children and teens. Ammunition should be stored and locked apart from the gun, and the keys for both should be kept in a different area from where you store your household keys. Always keep the keys to any firearms out of the reach of children and adolescents.

It's important to understand how suicide rates are different for boys and girls. Girls think about and attempt suicide about twice as often as boys, and girls tend to attempt suicide by overdosing on drugs or cutting themselves. Boys die by suicide about four times as much as girls, perhaps because they tend to use more lethal methods, such as firearms, hanging, or jumping from heights.

What Kids Are at Risk for Suicide?

Now that you're a parent, you might not remember how it felt to be a teen, caught in that gray area between childhood and adulthood. Sure, it's a time of great possibility but it can also be a period of great confusion and anxiety. There's pressure to fit in socially, to perform academically, and to act responsibly. There's the awakening of sexual feelings, a growing self-identity, and a need for autonomy that often conflicts with the rules and expectations set by others.

A teen with an adequate support network of friends, family, religious affiliations, peer groups, or extracurricular activities may have an outlet to deal with his or her everyday frustrations. But many teens don't feel like they have that, and they feel disconnected and isolated from family and friends. These teens are at increased risk for suicide.

Factors that increase the risk of suicide among teens include:

the presence of a psychological disorder, especially depression, bipolar disorder, and alcohol and substance use (In fact, approximately 95% of people who die by suicide have a psychological disorder at the time of death.)
feelings of distress, irritability, or agitation
feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness that often accompany depression (A teen, for example, who experiences repeated failures at school, who is overwhelmed by violence at home, or who is isolated from peers is likely to experience such feelings.)
a previous suicide attempt
a family history of depression or suicide (Depressive illnesses may have a genetic component, so some teens may be predisposed to suffer major depression.)
having suffered physical abuse or sexual abuse
lack of a support network, poor relationships with parents or peers, and feelings of social isolation
dealing with homosexuality in an unsupportive family or community or hostile school environment

Tantrum Tactics

2006-06-11T01:18:00.000+08:00

The most important thing to keep in mind when you're faced with a child in the throes of a tantrum, no matter what the cause, is simple and crucial: Keep cool. Don't complicate the problem with your own frustration. Kids can sense when parents are becoming frustrated. This can just make your child's frustration worse, and you may have a more exaggerated tantrum on your hands. Instead, take deep breaths and try to think clearly.

Your child relies on you to be the example. Hitting and spanking don't help; physical tactics send the message that using force and physical punishment is OK. Instead, have enough self-control for both of you.

First, try to understand what's going on. Tantrums should be handled differently depending on the cause. Try to understand where your child is coming from. For example, if your little one has just had a great disappointment, you may need to provide comfort.

It's a different situation when the tantrum stems from a child's being refused something. Toddlers have fairly rudimentary reasoning skills, so you aren't likely to get far with explanations. Ignoring the outburst is one way to handle it - if the tantrum poses no threat to your child or others. Continue your activities, paying no attention to your child but remaining within sight. Don't leave your little one alone, though, otherwise he or she may feel abandoned on top of all of the other uncontrollable emotions.

If your child is in danger of hurting himself or herself or others during a tantrum, take your child to a quiet, safe, place to calm down. This also applies to tantrums in public places.

Older kids are more likely to use tantrums to get their way if they've learned that this behavior works. Once kids are school age, it's appropriate to send them to their rooms to cool off. Rather than setting a specific time limit, you can tell your child that he or she must stay in the room until your child has regained control. The former option is empowering; your child can affect the outcome by his or her own actions, thereby gaining a sense of control that was lost during the tantrum.